Important factors
People do not always look for a mistress only because of the desire to satisfy natural needs. Sometimes a person is driven by the desire to gain understanding, care, affection and participation. Therefore, if a mistress wants to win over a man, then she will have to seriously work on herself.
The main principle of such relationships is that there is no need to hope that the lover will abruptly leave his wife. And in general, that he will get divorced. The chance of such a development of events is almost zero. Therefore, there is no need to hope.
The essence of a relationship with a lover is a mutually beneficial exchange. The mistress receives bonuses of a material nature, and the man receives sex and related things. You should not chase after a large number of patrons or do business with someone who disgusts you. The advantage of a “replacement lady” is that she is not exhausted by everyday life, does not suffer from various problems, and is easy to spend time with.
How to get out of the role of a mistress
Think about why you are such a cool, wonderful, smart, beautiful girl, maybe you are trying to achieve certain goals, and in general, you are just a normal person, you want to love and be loved, but you find yourself in a triangle? You feel hurt, bad, you didn’t get what you wanted.
What feelings make you accept the second role in love? And what can you do with these feelings so that you never find yourself in such a position again, so that you are never again robbed emotionally, so that you are not fooled by such illusions and endless promises?
The love triangle is a classic. People have been stepping on this rake for thousands of years, nothing new happens there. And it is not the greatest love that brings a woman to the role of mistress. Passion? May be. But this is not the kind of love on which serious, good and strong relationships are built. The role of a mistress is the need to be needed by someone, the fear of being left alone and taking responsibility for one’s own life.
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Ideal image2
Being in the role of a “second” person in bed is not so easy and simple. You need to come to terms with the idea of being in the shadows, not pretend to be more and be able to restrain yourself. This is not always easy to do, since you can see the chosen one cooing next to his legal wife. At such a moment, there will be a strong desire to cause a scandal in a fit of jealousy, but you need to remember: it will not bring much results.
You need to pay great attention to appearance, wardrobe and style. It is necessary to work on character, trying to smooth out negative traits. In any meeting with a lover, you need to adhere to goodwill, passion, and delight. Only such a lady will be popular with men.
Selling yourself is not easy, even if there is no direct transfer of money involved. For example, you can get a promotion at work or nice gifts. Sooner or later this will begin to depress and lead to personal problems.
A woman will begin to feel like she is just a commodity. Therefore, you need to leave time for rest, recovery and relaxation.
The ideal image of a mistress is a well-groomed, bright, artistic, beautiful lady who knows her worth and is skilled in love. It is not necessary to be a fatal beauty; it is much more important to be smart, funny and easy to communicate. The famous Lilya Brik was unprepossessing, but she charmed men.
Rules of conduct3
What should a mistress do? In order for the activity to be as successful as possible, you need to adhere to certain tactics. The first thing to remember is no whining, irritation, or showdown! You can't complain, whine and suffer - it's annoying and doesn't bring pleasure.
The more simple-minded a woman is, the greater the favor of the patron. You can’t overly belittle your intellectual merits to the level of a fool, but you can’t pretend to be a bore with high intelligence either.
Constantly work on your self-esteem. Every day you need to talk about yourself in the first person in front of the mirror. For example, “I’m beautiful,” “I’m smart,” “I’m sexy,” and so on. A person with a good ego reeks of attractiveness. Such a mistress will be in demand and men from the upper classes will compete for her attention.
It is necessary to improve intimately. Passion, frankness and a willingness to experiment will significantly increase a lady's value. Don't be afraid to take the initiative. Guys really love those girls who turn out to be goddesses in bed.
You can’t let yourself turn into a typical woman. In an unwashed terry robe, with a bun of hair and bags under his eyes. A mistress should always be well-groomed, beautiful, graceful. Elegance accompanies her everywhere. It wouldn’t hurt to practice dancing, strip dancing and something similar. This will make the movements flexible and mesmerizing.
It is necessary to think through the image well. Cosmetics (non-vulgar makeup), manicure (without kinks in the form of long claws), high-quality perfume - all this will allow the guy to remember his mistress and imagine her according to a number of characteristics.
Know how to provide support not only in the form of quality sex. For many people, it is psychologically easier to speak out to another person. Therefore, you need to refrain from condemnation and evaluation. It will take patience, listening and the ability to share values.
Even if it is very difficult to restrain yourself from a scandal, do not start it. Nobody wants a quarrelsome woman. Men quickly run away from such madams who like to sort things out. Therefore, a priori, only one role is permissible - a princess, and not an evil witch.
Ignore the fact of your chosen one’s marital status and demonstrate your feelings. Let him be sure that he is one and only of his kind. All representatives of the stronger sex like to be a superman in the eyes of a lady.
Don’t reproach, don’t whine or complain, don’t beg for gifts - these are the main guidelines for behavior. By following them you can easily achieve success.
Prohibited actions4
If a woman intends to become a mistress, then she must immediately understand that there are some things that cannot be done under any circumstances. The most important thing is that you cannot constantly pester about your marital status. Negativity will not add points and will only cause irritation. By constantly asking a man when he will divorce his wife, the lady will only achieve disgust and separation.
An explosion of emotions is a bad idea anyway. Therefore, you should control yourself, control yourself and not give in. Attempts to demand and beg for something will not be successful. Such tactics always lead to complete failure.
It is worth admitting to yourself that a relationship with a married person is necessary to obtain some benefit. No one will just tolerate a guy who is not free, listening to problems, or living a double life. Gifts can be accepted from a lover, but you cannot demand and ask for them, swearing if they are not good enough. At the same time, you can’t be too happy about him, since it will be unpleasant for any man to see the obvious fact: they are dating him only for the sake of money.
You can't be hysterical, but mumble is also a bad option. Pastime should turn into a holiday. To do this, you need to give up quarrels, whining, insults, and scandals. Rare meetings are filled with passion, dizzying sex, intimate conversations. You will want to return to such a woman.
You should not use banal manipulations - pressure to feel guilty, blackmail, hypercontrol. Otherwise, the chosen one will be pushed to a certain thought, and it will not be in favor of the mistress. Requirements to constantly report on where you are, work, and other events only turn you off.
Despite the widespread stereotype, men do not like stupid people. It’s not enough when relationships are limited only to sex. People still talk and therefore you need to engage in self-development.
Never try to secretly get pregnant and tie your chosen one with a child. This will only lead to a bad outcome. Do not pursue a person after a breakup, do not make attempts to sort things out, or take a man by surprise.
Experts tried to understand the psychology of mistresses who have achieved success in this field. The collected portrait is unobtrusive, modest, solves problems on her own.
You can't achieve anything by force
When the mistress's patience comes to an end, she realizes that her expectations are not met and begins to get angry, blame the man for everything, and then blackmail is used. I worked a lot with triangles. There are times when a very young girl finds herself in such a situation. And the man has status, he has a career and reputation. And blackmail is simply dangerous for her life.
Blackmail and manipulation begin, the man begins to get angry and think through ways of retreat, how to calm her down so that she does not cause grief to him or to herself, first of all. He did not promise the woman anything else, so he does not understand her complaints. The man begins to move away, the manipulations intensify, and the relationship becomes worse.
Even in such situations, threats to tell your wife everything do not work. This happens when the tension reaches such a level that a woman no longer has the strength to endure. The man is triggered by guilt and fear, and he begins to hate his mistress. Accordingly, he quickly leaves because he understands that this relationship has now become dangerous. This woman is now a danger to his entire system, she can destroy everything. All the good feelings go away.
Sometimes mistresses simply try to influence a man through persuasion and requests. He responds to this with promises that do not lead to serious action. This method doesn't work either. The begging mistress is in a too unequal position compared to the wife, who holds the entire house and continues its lineage. Therefore, the mistress will always be the most vulnerable link in the triangle; she will suffer the most.
Main secret5
It's actually not that difficult to achieve success. Representatives of the stronger sex willingly go to the house where they are expected and loved. Where their opinion is valued and considered valuable, where they are listened to, understood and not judged. The right mistress will not swear, make trouble or sort things out. She gets pleasure and bonuses, and he gets sex and communication.
In modern society, morality is outdated. Therefore, girls need to kill the victim in themselves. Everyone determines the scope of morality and the boundaries of what is permitted. Therefore, if you want a relationship with a married man, and he doesn’t mind, then what can stop them?
Any kept woman understands perfectly well what she is getting into. Therefore, it is stupid to quarrel, conflict and cause scenes of jealousy. The rules were known from the beginning and it’s strange to be offended by them.
You may not be able to control yourself and inform your wife, but this is unlikely to bring a divorce. But breaking up a relationship with your mistress is very possible. Therefore, it is better to pretend to be nice and take advantage of the situation.
Tactics with married people 6
In order to successfully date a non-free man, you need to understand several points. First, always remember your place. It sounds rude, but it perfectly reflects the essence of what is happening. Even if you subconsciously want to be a wife, your imagination draws idealistic pictures, never talk to him about the future.
Representatives of the stronger sex perceive attempts at forced marriage negatively. Any attempts to induce divorce and a new wedding will be met with disgust and will lead to separation.
During meetings, you need to postpone any business. Home life is stressful and causes negative emotions. Men often run away from his family and look for connections on the side. Yes, occasionally you can ask to fix a cabinet door, but you shouldn’t abuse it.
Never show a bad mood. Even if you really want to, PMS rages and many other things seem wrong. A mistress is an island of comfort and pleasant emotions.
At the same time, one must not allow the lover to become too dominant. He begins to control life, tell him what to do and what not to do, and demand that he give up something. All this must be strictly suppressed.
Representatives of the stronger sex are tired of monotony. Therefore, there is no need to be afraid of changes in appearance, experiments in bed and unusual joint activities. Leave time for ordinary concerns, as relationships in the spirit of 24 hours, 7 days a week are quite tiring.
Any woman should leave room for intrigue. Therefore, you shouldn’t tell everything to the end, reveal all your cards at once and somehow make yourself easier. You can make it clear that life is full of different things and it is not always easy to find an hour for a meeting.
There is no place for joy in the triangle
In a love triangle, neither party will be happy. The mistress should have a goal - to see the light, to understand the reasons why this is happening in her life, and not try to take the man away from the family by any means.
The same goes for the wife. Why did a second woman appear in the family? If a wife mentally imagines her mistress and looks at her, she will feel hatred and anger. But if a wife asks her mistress: “What are you giving to my man, my husband, that I didn’t give?” After all, if the wife again begins to give her husband the recognition and emotions that he needs, the mistress will no longer be needed.
I often hear in consultations: “Here, my husband... but he’s married.” I say: “He is the husband of another woman, you don’t even have the right to call him husband.” And the woman replies: “No, we live, he promises me.” That is, she is in complete illusion.
It is clear that it is difficult for a mistress to break this emotional codependent connection, because she will have to go nowhere, crush her hopes, dreams and enter the bride market with grievances against men. Therefore, you need to work with feelings, you need to work with self-esteem. And don’t blame yourself, because being a mistress is not bad, it’s ineffective.
