How to behave with a man on a first date

In life, everything is a first, and therefore unknown and a little scary. The first date, if it is actually the first meeting, can be a step towards a long-term serious relationship or lead to disappointment and pain. We are not talking now about easy relationships by mutual consent. We are talking about the beginning of the union of two loving hearts. A woman expects much more from such a date than her partner.

Awakening the desire for new meetings is a difficult task, but quite solvable. Much depends on you.

Getting rid of misconceptions

On the eve of a date it will be superfluous, some common misconceptions:

naive fears When getting ready for a long-awaited meeting, a girl gradually convinces herself that her new acquaintance is only interested in sexual contacts. Therefore, when communicating with a young man, she puts on a mask of inaccessibility. “I’m not ready for a close relationship” is her main style of behavior. You should not defend yourself without waiting for an attack. Perhaps the man had no intentions at all other than meeting another representative of the fair sex.
suspicious distrust The woman expects a trick in advance, prepares to be deceived. She is convinced that a stranger must be extremely sincere and honest. Trying to catch her partner in a lie, she herself forces him to lie.
a riot of fantasy A beautiful picture created by a rich imagination does not coincide with the original. You should not trust photographs on the Internet, absentee descriptions and characteristics. If you let your imagination run wild, you won’t be disappointed.

To avoid becoming another victim of stereotypical thinking, do not try to predict the development of events. Everything has its time. You will always have time to be upset, but in the meantime, prepare and hope.

The most important

The main goal of a woman who is going on a first date with a man is to please him, to arouse interest in her personality, and to gain respect. To do this, learn five basic rules:

Know your worth. Let your admirer independently find a meeting place convenient for you. He will even be pleased.
Do not keep yourself waiting under any circumstances. This is disrespect for your partner. The widespread belief that a girl can be forgiven for any tardiness is a crafty lie. The relationship should be respectful and equal from the very beginning. Why are you allowed to do something that would be unpleasant for you?
Leave your shyness at home. Your task is to be restrained, but not timid and withdrawn. A kind smile, an open look, and a casual conversation will relieve the tension of the first meeting and create a favorable mood. Remember, a man is also worried and worried. Try to be natural.
The main thing is a sense of proportion. When meeting someone for the first time, watch your manners. What is accepted and familiar among close friends (loud laughter, loose movements, categorical statements) is inappropriate with a stranger.

Let's learn a lesson: when going on a first date with a guy, the main thing is to create interest and a desire to continue communication. To do this, you don’t need to imitate your favorite heroine from the movie. An original is always more valuable than a copy.

Should you kiss and when?

Kissing on the first date is an individual decision; people approach it differently. Contrary to popular belief about a girl's availability, a kiss does not actually confirm this fact.

If a man adheres to old concepts, then it is better not to kiss on the first date. To find out the answer, you need to ask directly. If there was no kiss on the first date, this can be corrected at the second or third meeting; there is no point in delaying the expression of feelings longer: the guy will consider the sympathy friendly and may lose interest.

Let's understand the details

So, you're in luck. You are going on a first date with a man with whom you are going to start a family. What do you need to pay attention to? You need to imagine yourself in the place of the chosen one and take into account several main points:

They meet you by their clothes

Consider your appearance carefully. Objectively evaluate the strengths and weaknesses of your figure. Make an effort and change your image for one day:

If you like a tracksuit, choose classic trousers;
If you like faded jeans and hoodies, wear a dress.

You should not shock your chosen one with an excessively short skirt, deep neckline and tight curves. There must be a mystery in a woman. You will show all your charms gradually in the process of further communication.

Getting your hair done

Look at yourself carefully, remember the last time you visited a hairdresser. Even a trendy and expensive outfit cannot compensate for an unkempt hairstyle. The impression will be ruined. When styling your hair, keep a few tips in mind. It's better if:

the haircut is modern, but not shocking;
hair color is as natural as possible, not green or purple;
The styling is neat, but not pretentious.

Your hair should be an addition to the image, and not an object of close attention and surprise.

Doing makeup

Makeup is a delicate matter. It will emphasize individuality. When applying cosmetics, take your time. Focus on what you like most about yourself. For example, when emphasizing your eyes, do not highlight your lips with bright lipstick. If possible, use the services of a professional cosmetologist. The first date with a man is a responsible matter and should be approached seriously.

Choosing a scent

If you use certain perfumes, you shouldn’t change your habits. While you are in the process of searching, choose a pleasant, long-lasting scent that will make you stand out among the crowd.

Taking into account the weather

Before you go to a long-awaited meeting, look out the window. It may be raining or the wind has picked up. Be fully prepared. The absence of an umbrella can ruin any meeting.

Remember, a man with serious intentions is attracted to femininity and charm. A frivolous rake - a deep neckline and short skirts.

Choose an outfit based on who you hope to meet: a potential spouse or sexual partner.

Let's learn a lesson: We dress in such a way as to attract the attention of the chosen one, and not those of others. You should look a little sexy, erotic and mysterious. There is no need to flaunt your charms. Attracts the unknown. Let there be a mystery within you. To solve it, the man will want to meet again.

Clothing for a girl's date: what's best to wear? Makeup and fragrance

Women are sometimes more interested in their external image than their behavior. A lady should not be intimidated by an overly revealing outfit.

Clothing is chosen that is appropriate for the establishment where the meeting is planned:

For an evening in a cafe, cinema, or city walk, variations in casual style are suitable: discreet shades of clothing, unpretentious accessories, comfortable shoes with flat soles or with a stable heel. A dress with a cardigan or trousers with a blouse will do. Bright makeup is inappropriate in the image.
A knee-length cocktail dress is suitable for a restaurant It is better without a collar, long sleeves, or massive decorations. A clutch and pumps will help complement your wardrobe item. The clothes are combined with a classic straight-cut coat. Suitable for evening makeup.
For a picnic, feel free to wear jeans with T-shirts, jumpers, sweatshirts, sneakers, and sneakers. It's best to avoid tracksuits.

A universal option for a cafe or restaurant is a sheath dress, black, brown, blue, or light in color. A necklace with a large pendant and dangling earrings will complement the look.

The top is selected according to the season. For ladies who don't like dresses, pipe jeans, classic trousers with a jumper and blouse are suitable. On top there is a knitted cardigan and a cashmere jacket. Accessories and makeup to a minimum.

Meeting point

It will be better if you take the decision about the place of the first date into your own hands. You need to meet on neutral territory, but always where you feel confident and comfortable. Don't take an exotic hot air balloon ride if you're afraid of heights. A nightclub or a noisy disco will turn a date into a waste of time. Loud music will interfere with conversation. Dim lighting will hide facial expressions. A large crowd will distract attention. You will have fun and part without knowing each other.

Even if you are used to spending your free time in a noisy company, your first date with a man should take place in a calm, quiet place. Agree to meet at a restaurant or cafe. Go to a cinema or an exhibition. Don't shy away from a walk in the park or in the evening city.

Lesson learned: The choice of where to date should always be yours.

Let's talk about the main thing

How to behave with a man on the first date to achieve your goal. This is only greeted by “clothes”, but everyone sees off “by the mind”. Let's look at several options.

You are young and attractive, have no shortage of male attention, and are not going to give up your freedom in the foreseeable future. In this case, there is nothing to worry about. The style of behavior is not limited by strict boundaries. You can relax and not think about words and gestures. After all, a first date is another adventure. If the meeting does not meet your expectations, do not be discouraged. You have time to try again.
You are ripe for family life and are actively searching for your other half. Then approach the matter with full responsibility. It is this situation that needs to be discussed in more detail.

First, try to calm down and not think that the date will end in failure. Our mental ideas can become reality. Treat the upcoming event lightly, but responsibly. If you want to find a friend or dream of a long-term relationship, pay attention to the following points:

The first minutes of the meeting

The first glance, the first phrases, the first touches can become decisive in the development of further events. Therefore, every little detail is important. Smiling sincerely, look into your partner's eyes and say something nice. Be surprised at the punctuality, praise the meeting place, thank you for the flowers. A little flattery at the beginning of a date with a guy will make you feel comfortable and create a favorable impression.

Intellectual conversation

Think in advance about questions that can be discussed during the meeting:

show interest in his hobbies;
talk about your profession without touching on the topic of income;
share your plans;
tell us about what you love, what you do, what you dream about.

Don't try to shine with your intelligence or seem naive. Know how to pause, shifting the responsibility for maintaining the conversation to the interlocutor. It is better if the conversation is frank, but not too serious. Do not try to find out the details of your personal life, leave aside questions of religion, and do not focus on your financial situation.

The first date with a man is valuable not for the information collected, but for your feelings from communicating with your partner.

Objective attitude

It is very important to see not only the shortcomings of your partner, but also your own weaknesses. Don't be afraid to admit you're nervous before the meeting. Thus, you show your weakness, vulnerability, and your partner has a desire to show his strength in order to protect him and protect him from unpleasant experiences. A person who does not hide his weaknesses evokes sympathy and respect because he is not afraid to openly admit it.

Demonstrating an ironic attitude is useful not only towards your loved one, but also towards your interlocutor. You shouldn’t prevaricate, admiring every word and gesture of a man. This will cause bewilderment and suspicion of the insincerity of your feelings. After all, a person knows that he is far from ideal. Don't turn a blind eye to your chosen one's mistakes and awkwardnesses. By your behavior, make it clear that you see and forgive his weaknesses and expect a response from him. Remember a similar situation that happened in your life, turn the awkwardness into a joke. In a word, do not strain your new acquaintance, defuse the situation. Let him make sure that such a trifle is not a hindrance to your relationship.

Light irony and an adequate attitude towards oneself and one’s partner attract more than feigned admiration and narcissism.

A little slyness

calm, confident behavior will create the impression of a familiar environment. Even if dating is a rare occurrence for you, pretend that you feel comfortable;
be serious and a little thoughtful. Let your partner torment himself with guesses about what thoughts are crowding into your charming head;
express approval, give compliments. Representatives of the stronger sex also love to be praised;
if you want to like him on the first date, talk to the guy about pleasant or neutral things. No negativity or complaints about fate, relatives, friends.

There is no need to lie or hide past relationships. Just cheat: don’t talk about what’s unpleasant to you.

Tactfulness and delicacy

It is quite understandable that you want to know more about your chosen one. However, too intrusive questions can cause a negative reaction. If a man wants to share something intimate, listen, expressing sincere sympathy and interest. Avoids direct questions - don’t be offended, tactfully shift the conversation to another topic. At this stage of the relationship, your task is to listen and not interrupt.

Smile

A smile is the key to a good mood. A smiling person inspires trust. He wants to smile back. Consequently, contact between interlocutors will be established faster. Provided that the smile is sincere and friendly, and not polite, strained or mysterious.

Believe in yourself

Self-confidence is the main component of success. Every morning, looking in the mirror, repeat the phrases: “I am irresistible, attractive and charming! The men around me like me!” If you carry out such training systematically, you will gain confidence and can confidently go on a date. Love yourself, and the man you like will be yours.

goodbye

The date has come to an end, questions remain.

The man is required to pay in the cafe. Your task is to politely thank them for their attention and say that dinner and communication gave you pleasure. Even if in your heart you decide to end the relationship, maintain decency. The person who paid the bill and spent the evening with you does not deserve an insulting, indifferent “Bye.”

In order not to feel obligated (especially if your partner did not live up to expectations), you can offer to divide the amount on the bill in half. However, don't insist. This will put the person in a humiliating position. In any case, it’s more pleasant to part without resenting each other.

What mistakes should you avoid?

When you are invited on a date, it is not recommended to immediately agree; it is better to wait some time. It's better not to make a date yourself.

Common behavioral mistakes are as follows:

Anxiety can completely ruin an evening. Think in advance about what you can talk about, try to calm down. Wear comfortable clothes that do not restrict movement.
Don't jump to conclusions. People find it difficult to behave naturally with a stranger. Perhaps your boyfriend was worried. Give it another chance.
Don't order overly expensive dishes at a restaurant. Although it is customary for the gentleman to treat him, offer to pay for himself. This will only improve your opinion of yourself.
Don't compare your partner to your ex. All people are different. Even if it seems to you that your current boyfriend is somehow worse than your ex-boyfriend, it may turn out that he has a lot of other advantages. You simply don't know about them.

Boundaries of what is permitted

Is it acceptable to drink alcohol on a first date? Drink to your health, but within reasonable limits. A glass of good wine will relieve tension and make communication natural and relaxed. You can only abuse alcohol if you do not plan to continue the relationship. We relaxed, rested and went in different directions. To start a serious romance, alcoholic drinks are unacceptable.

It is impossible to determine the generally accepted level of intimacy on a first date with a guy. It is necessary to take into account individual character traits, upbringing, and moral values. All women are different. One will limit itself to meaningful glances. The second will stop at hugs and kisses. The third will decide on intimacy.

Time-tested advice from a psychologist will help you avoid making a fatal mistake. Determine which category you belong to and follow the specialist's recommendations.

If this person is the most important thing in your life. You feel that you are in love, dream of a long-term relationship, think about marriage. So, gather all your willpower and restrain your feelings. Close relationships on the first date are contraindicated for you. Follow the popular wisdom: “The slower you go, the further you will go.” This is the only right path for you.
If you are emotional, impulsive and frivolous, and the sight of a man sitting opposite makes your voice tremble and your mouth dry, you will have to reciprocate his frank views. If you are unable to cope with attraction, take risks and enjoy communicating with the person you like. Perhaps this sudden love at first sight is mutual. And such a feeling does not recognize any boundaries.
If you are modest and shy and this meeting is your first experience of communicating with a man, do not rush things. Remember: you don't owe your partner anything. Only a mutual desire to get closer is acceptable. Don't be afraid to seem outdated and shy. If a person does not respect your feelings, end the relationship without regret. This is clearly not your man.

How to behave with a man on a first date, and where to set the boundaries of what is permissible when going on a first date with a man, is up to the woman to decide. Do as your heart tells you, but try not to lose your head.

So what is next…

The first date is over, but questions remain. And the most exciting of them: how a girl should behave after a date if a new meeting has not been scheduled. Think about what is best for you:

take the initiative and offer to continue communication. If you have enough determination, act immediately;
Limit yourself to a regular message, ask about your well-being or how you are doing at work, and don’t insist on another meeting. Write and wait for the next step from your chosen one;
choose a passive position and patiently look at the silent phone.

Any decision will be correct. Not only women, but also men experience fear of new relationships. Perhaps your active position will help your partner to be bolder and more decisive. Don't be afraid to get rejected. After all, a negative result is also a result. He will force you to move on without wasting time.

Relationship with a married man

If a married man asks you out on a date, refuse. You should not believe his words about a bad relationship with his wife and an impending divorce. Statistics prove that men who say such words rarely actually leave the family. There is a great risk of remaining in the role of a mistress.

A relationship with a married man is also undesirable for your self-esteem. Constant competition with his wife will not bring anything good, even if the man leaves the family. Statistics prove that second and subsequent marriages are destroyed more often than first ones, so there is a high probability that the man will leave you later.

In addition, attempts to win over a married man take up a lot of time, during which time one could meet a worthy partner. Take a break from falling in love with a married man, do something pleasant, have a bachelorette party or organize any other leisure activity that charges you with positive emotions. Women who are passionate about their business are more likely to meet worthy gentlemen.

So that the first does not become the only

The first date with a man will not be the last if, when going to the meeting, you follow the following rules:

We give preference to decent clothes. You will demonstrate extravagance later;
Don't forget about light makeup and a pleasant aroma. A little cosmetics won’t hurt even those who are used to looking natural;
We accept signs of attention with dignity. If there are none, tactfully push your companion to action. Ask to move a chair, pause in front of a closed door;
We avoid both empty and too serious questions. If the conversation isn't going well, don't talk about the weather. Perhaps you just made the wrong choice;
We don't bother you with problems. A first date with a cute guy is not the place to decide important issues;
not a word about exes. Talking about past loves, memories of husbands and admirers can cause irritation and annoyance. Live for today, forgetting about the past for a while;
We’re not talking about children and beloved pets. It is possible that a man does not yet think about children and is not moved by the sight of a charming cat;
We show feminine weakness. We do not demonstrate physical strength, strong-willed character and skills of a successful business lady. On the first date, the man should play this role.

Of course, the first impression can be deceiving, but it is better for it to be pleasant. Then there will be a chance to understand everything in more detail.

How to behave with a man on a first date is a whole science. To master it means you are guaranteed to achieve your goal. Life is not a movie, and there are no multiple takes in it, therefore, there is no room for error. The main thing is to believe: the first date did not live up to expectations - there will be another one that will definitely make you happy.

Useful video:

How to behave after a date?

Feelings after the first evening are usually unpredictable. Both partners need time to think about the next meeting. If there was no conversation about the second date, it is not a fact that it was the last. It is not recommended to call or write yourself; the man must take the initiative. It is only permissible to hint in a message that you enjoyed the evening.

If the pastime was not very pleasant, there is no need to draw hasty conclusions, it was also difficult for the guy, you must definitely give him a chance to correct the situation.

If there is a complete lack of mutual sympathy, you should not repeat the date: a person does not need extra hopes. It is also necessary to behave with dignity even if the gentleman is not impressed. It is enough to thank the person for his sincerity and wish him good luck in finding love.