How to get pleasure from a man to a woman: advice from a psychologist

  • October 29, 2019
  • Psychology of relationships
  • Michael Michaelis

Unfortunately, girls often have to fake an orgasm during sex with a man. The reasons for this can be very different. In our article you will find the answer to the question of how a woman can get pleasure from a man, and also why even a young girl cannot experience an orgasm with her loved one. Be sure that after reading this material you will know exactly how to normalize your sex life with your sexual partner.

Why can't a woman have an orgasm?

Before answering the question of how a woman can enjoy sex, it is necessary to understand why girls cannot reach the highest point of pleasure when having intimacy with their loved one. Most psychologists and sexologists identify the main factors that provoke the development of such a scenario.

  1. Uncertainty about one's own appearance. Unfortunately, some girls simply cannot focus on having fun just because they are not sure that their partner really wants them. A variety of phrases begin to appear in my head: “What if he thinks I’m ugly,” “My breasts are probably too small for him,” “The smell of sweat might scare him away.” This does not allow the girl to concentrate on having fun. Therefore, you should always be ready for sex.
  2. Stress and fatigue. Problems, being stuck at work, emotional stress - all these are the main enemies of the “female high”. Even during intimate intimacy, a woman can become fixated on one or another problem, ceasing to listen to her own feelings. However, until the mind relaxes, the body will also remain tense and orgasm will not occur. Therefore, it is so important to leave all negative thoughts and focus on having fun, because sex is a great way to get rid of stress.
  3. Inferiority complex. Some representatives of the fair sex tend not only to feel insecure in their own abilities, but even to hate themselves for certain “imperfections.” A girl with an inferiority complex is unlikely to even be able to get properly aroused. However, it is important to understand that there are no perfect men or women. In addition, if a young man chooses a beauty to have intimacy with her, this means that he really likes her.

"Deadly" high without drugs

Parents! You should know about this. Forewarned is forearmed.

“Dog high” (“Space Cowboy”, “In Seventh Heaven”) or the game of choking is a way of obtaining dubious euphoria, common among modern children and adolescents.

To get a high, the holotropic breathing technique and a special method of tightening a rope around the neck are used, which then must be quickly removed. After temporary hypoxia, blood suddenly rushes into the brain, and the person sees hallucinations and experiences a state of intense euphoria. Yes! This is a “high” without drugs! But how many lives have already found themselves in that same “seventh heaven”!

Symptoms by which you can understand that your child is “playing” to be choked:

  • characteristic bruises on the neck (or a mark from a rope);
  • frequent fainting;
  • dyspnea;
  • lethargy;
  • very pale skin;
  • “bruises” under the eyes;
  • the desire to retire, to be alone.

Other dubious ways to achieve euphoria without drugs are short-term pinching of the carotid artery or inducing fainting by pressing on the chest of someone standing against a wall, limiting the flow of air. Popular among schoolchildren. Children usually gather in groups to get high in this way.

Even if these “games with death” do not end in her favor, they have disastrous consequences for the body. Due to a constant lack of oxygen, irreversible changes develop in the brain: decreased intelligence, memory impairment, severe lethargy, irritability and insomnia. An ischemic stroke may develop. Due to oxygen starvation, the heart also suffers.

Learn to love your own body

How can a woman get pleasure from a man? We will have to get rid of the barrier that does not allow the beauty to achieve orgasm. In most cases, this role is played by hatred of one’s own body. Even slender and beautiful girls can begin to worry a lot about this - this is a feature of female psychology. However, if a girl does not learn to love her body and accept it as it is, then she will not be able to enjoy it.

There is one technique that will allow even girls with “inferior” appearance to learn to love themselves - just find those advantages in yourself that others do not have. For example, obese women often have large breasts, which men are crazy about. And a girl with a not very pretty face can have a slender and toned body. Therefore, learn to love yourself for those things that are already present in you, because men pay attention to them.

Your oxytocin levels are low

Oxytocin, which is also known as the hormone of happiness and love, is directly linked to orgasms, says Dr. Van Kirk. If your body doesn't produce enough of this hormone, you may find it difficult to achieve satisfaction. Stress is the main cause of low oxytocin levels. Don't worry, spending more time with your partner, holding hands, looking into their eyes and kissing can increase your levels of this hormone. If you have a pet, hug it more often, scientists have proven that this promotes the release of oxytocin.

Explore your erogenous zones

Answering the question of how a girl can get pleasure, one cannot help but note the fact that experts distinguish two types of orgasm in the fair sex: clitoral and vaginal. The second one is more intense and bright, so you should focus on it. Just start exploring the points on your body where you feel the most pleasure when pressed.

Remember that there is nothing wrong with recommending that your man stimulate you in one place or another. However, do it in a fit of passion while having sex, so that the man does not take it as a serious conversation and think that he cannot bring you pleasure. If you teach your boyfriend to satisfy you correctly, then one day you will be able to reach the peak of pleasure.

Vaginal stimulation4

Few people believe that it is possible to achieve vaginal orgasm through masturbation, since there is no complete replacement for the male penis designed for penetration into the vagina. However, with the right approach to the process of vaginal masturbation, you can not only get a lot of pleasant sensations, but also achieve a vivid orgasm.

By stimulating the G-spot, located on the inner wall of the vagina, and applying light pressure to it using a masturbation device, you can experience sexual pleasure and achieve release.

Basic tips and methods for achieving vaginal orgasm:

  • With light massage movements, open the labia slightly to gain full access to the vagina;
  • make sure that there is enough natural lubrication for comfortable vaginal masturbation, otherwise use additional lubrication;

  • plunge the dildo or fingers into the vagina, pushing them inside with the help of thrusts, plunging them in and removing them back;
  • regulate the speed of movements and change their direction: these can be movements with immersion in and removal of fingers or a toy out, as well as circular movements inside the vagina and stimulation of the G-spot;
  • use additional functions of your sex toy: speed and frequency of vibrations, massage movements, vacuum force.

If you do everything right, listening to the responses of your body, then you will definitely be able to achieve an incredible vaginal orgasm.

Find the optimal position and maintain rhythm

If you are wondering how a girl can enjoy sex, we strongly recommend that you pay attention to the position in which you most often engage in intimacy. Most likely, you have chosen the wrong position and the man simply cannot hit the erogenous zone. Therefore, we recommend that you try different positions to find the ideal option, because some people like the position on top, and others on the bottom.

Also remember that maintaining rhythm during sexual intercourse also plays an important role. First you need to decide what kind of movements you prefer: slow and smooth or fast and hard. Don’t be afraid to tell your partner during sex: “Harder!” or “Gentle!” to get maximum pleasure. And try to maintain this rhythm throughout the entire time of intercourse.

Anal masturbation5

Anal stimulation allows you to achieve orgasm due to the fact that the rectum is adjacent to the vagina through a common wall and makes it possible to influence the sensitive G-spot.

It is important not to forget about the use of lubricant, since the anus is a rather sensitive area, but is not intended by nature for penetration and, accordingly, does not secrete lubricant.

Tips for achieving pleasure through anal stimulation:

  • massaging the area of ​​skin around the entrance to the anus, gently plunge one or more fingers inside;
  • you can either plunge your fingers in and out, or use circular movements inside the anus itself;
  • speed up if you feel the need and slow down if you feel discomfort;
  • You can achieve orgasm only by listening to your body, so be attentive to yourself and your feelings;
  • use toys to stimulate the anus, they will help you achieve an amazing orgasm without using your hands: vibrators, plugs, balls - whatever you like and gives pleasure.

Train your vaginal muscles

Many men wonder whether women enjoy sex. We answer especially for you: how can they get it! However, it is slightly different from what men experience. After all, if guys feel 90% of pleasure during orgasm, then for girls the sensations are distributed evenly throughout the entire process of intercourse. Who gets more pleasure: a woman or a man depends on the partner’s skills and his desires.

However, if a girl wants to give pleasure not only to herself, but also to her loved one, then she can use a special exercise that stimulates the vaginal muscles. To do this, they need to be tensed for 10 seconds and then relaxed. Thanks to this, the muscle structure will be denser, so even a man will be able to enjoy penetration, and a woman will be able to achieve orgasm much faster.

How to achieve deep urethral stimulation5

The method of performing sounding depends on individual preferences, anatomy, level of experience and some other factors. It is therefore not surprising that there are many different ways to perform urethral sounding.

Some people prefer what is called deep stimulation. It provides a lot of benefits, but is intended only for more advanced users. Deep urethral probing can cause problems and increase the risk of injury and other problems. This is especially true for those who want to try direct prostate or bladder massage.

The best way to take it to the next level is by training and stretching the urethra. This is where educational toys come in so handy. At the same time, these toys are not always large enough to penetrate really deep into the urethra.

Once you are ready to start going deeper and doing prostate massage, you are no longer a beginner. By now you should be able to insert regular urethral toys and stretch your urethra without difficulty. To easily move on to larger and longer devices that can penetrate as deep as possible into the urethra.

Control your breathing

It is important for any man that a woman enjoys intercourse. This increases his self-confidence. This is why many girls who cannot experience an orgasm simply prefer to fake it. However, it is much easier to solve a problem than to try to hide it. For example, in some cases, a beauty cannot achieve pleasure only because her blood is not supplied with sufficient oxygen.

For optimal muscle contractions, a girl must learn to breathe correctly. It is important to inhale the air deeply and exhale as slowly as possible. Also, you should not hold your breath at the moment of orgasm itself, as this can interrupt the process, resulting in incomplete pleasure. So don't be afraid to breathe properly. Most men are delighted when they hear the languid sighs or even moans of a beauty.

Content:

  1. Description and mechanism of action
  2. Effect on the body
  3. Addiction and symptoms


The psychostimulant substance cocaine is one of the most famous natural euphoretics. The pure drug, obtained from the coca plant, is considered the most expensive, and its “street” analogue, crack, is available to low-income people. The purpose of this article is to popularly explain whether cocaine is addictive and why it is dangerous. Why is it that the natives of America, who chewed coca leaves for many years, lived happily ever after, while modern drug addicts rarely live to be forty, dying in terrible pain, or remain deeply physically and mentally disabled.

Promote a policy of moderation

The harsh truth is that most men have an orgasm much faster than they can bring a representative of the fair sex to it. As a rule, this occurs 15-20 minutes after entry. Girls need 25 to 30 minutes to experience orgasm. However, asking a guy to continue after he's already exhausted would be selfish, wouldn't it? Then how can a woman get pleasure from a man who cums faster than her?

Everything is very simple - you just need to adhere to the policy of moderation. That is, a man should not enter his partner immediately. To begin with, he will need to devote a few minutes (from 10 to 15) to foreplay. This will allow the man to begin to receive pleasure from the moment when the beauty is already halfway to orgasm. You just need to simply ask your partner not to rush into entering.

Orgasm like an electric shock (a very personal story)

I’ve been moving toward this for quite some time—to understanding my sensuality, my feminine nature. After all, sexuality in our culture is a kind of taboo. Like many, I literally absorbed with my mother’s milk the attitude “It’s a shame to be sexy.”

But one day, during intercourse, I noticed an interesting pattern: the more I was able to relax and enter the state of a woman - feeling, sexy, loving - the more my partner surprised me. He, like a mirror, reflected what I thought and felt about myself.

The more I internally felt like the most beautiful and desirable, wild and passionate, the more my partner felt like a man. Strength and power awoke in him, which turned me on even more... His masculine energy amazingly awakened my feminine power in me, as a result, orgasm occurred easily and freely. And the most interesting thing is that my orgasm was very powerful, comparable in strength only to an electric discharge.

Then I decided to understand this topic, and at the same time monitor my own feelings and thoughts that contributed to (or interfered with) orgasm. It’s not for nothing that the sages say that the external is only a reflection of what is inside us.

So, I did a fair bit of digging into the topic and dug through a ton of information. I listened to the opinions of experts and interviewed friends. And most importantly, I tried the acquired knowledge and recommendations on myself. As a result, I came to the conclusion: there are 3 main reasons that prevent a woman from experiencing an orgasm and getting the desired sensations during sex.

Diversify your intimate life

Also, the problem of many couples is that the partners simply get bored with each other. And there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. No matter how much you like peaches, you will not get the same pleasure from them as you did when you first tried them for the rest of your life. However, no one says that you should cheat on your partner. But adding variety to your sex life is a pretty good idea.

Sometimes it is enough to simply change the environment in which intercourse usually takes place. That is, if you usually have sex in the bedroom, then be sure to try the bathroom or kitchen to feel new sensations. You can also buy various toys or costumes for role-playing games, which make most partners experience completely new emotions, as if you were having intimacy with another person.

How to perform sounding4

By following all safety recommendations and knowing how to properly perform urethral stimulation, you can experience truly incredible sensations.

Once you're ready to begin, make sure your urethra is wide enough to accommodate the rod. If you feel resistance or discomfort, stop immediately or choose a smaller urethral toy.

  • Start with lubrication. Apply a sufficient amount to the head of the penis. Take your toy and apply lube generously to it, especially the tip of the toy.
  • Take the rod with one hand and place the tip on the opening of the penis. Keep in mind that many devices do not require an erection. In other words, they are easier to insert into a flaccid penis than into an erect one.
  • Carefully insert the toy into the hole and allow it to gently slide inside. You should not face resistance or pain. You should not force anything into your urethra!
  • Let the rod settle into position on its own. It will stop at the deepest point of your urethra. Don't try to push it as deep as possible!
  • Give your urethra some time to get used to the toy and adjust to it. If necessary, you can add more lubricant.
  • If you want the device to penetrate deeper, try changing the angle of penetration. The urethra has a natural curve at one point, so changing the angle can help push the toy further.

However, this should not cause pain. If you encounter strong resistance or discomfort, stop immediately.

  • Once the toy is comfortably inserted, you can begin to stimulate your penis to get an erection. You can also slide it in and out to improve the sensation. Experiment until you find out what brings you the most pleasure.

Increase the frequency of sex

How can a woman enjoy sex with a man? Sometimes it's enough just to start being intimate with your partner more often. After all, rare sexual intercourse has a negative impact on the state of the beauty’s libido. Therefore, it is important to take the initiative. Moreover, it is recommended to do this at the most unexpected moment, so that the pleasure from intercourse is maximum. That is, if you usually have sex at night, then do it during the day.

If your partner is too busy to devote much time, then be sure to try masturbation, which will allow you to answer the question of how a woman can get pleasure without a man. If a girl can bring herself to orgasm, then it won’t be too difficult for her boyfriend. The most important thing is regular practice, which will not allow you to miss important skills that have been learned.

Do you often wear heels?

Not only are high-heeled shoes painful to walk in, but they also have a deforming effect on the psoas muscles, which are connected to the pelvic muscles and nerves, as well as the genitals. “When your psoas muscles are tight and distorted from wearing high-heeled shoes for a long time, they cannot transmit the arousal signal needed to achieve orgasm,” explains Dr. Eden Fromberg, founder of the Gynecology Center in New York City. Therefore, try to give preference to more comfortable shoes.

Try taking an aphrodisiac

There are quite a few means in nature that will allow a woman to receive pleasure from a man. Dietary supplements are made based on natural ingredients, which allow you to increase blood circulation in the pelvis and increase libido. In extreme cases, you can start tablets prescribed by a specialist. Well, the simplest aphrodisiac is regular chocolate.

However, keep in mind that you should take such drugs at your own peril and risk. After all, even a slight overdose can negatively affect a girl’s health and provoke the development of side effects. In addition, it is recommended to take such drugs in combination with psychotherapy, since in most cases the reason for the lack of orgasm lies in the girl’s subconscious. Therefore, do not neglect a visit to a specialist.

Literature:

  1. Drugs: properties, action, pharmacokinetics, metabolism: textbook / N.V. Veselovskaya [etc.]. — 3rd ed., revised, corrected. and additional - Moscow: Narconet, 2008. - 262 p.
  2. Causes of development and clinical manifestations of alcohol disorders and drug addiction: educational manual / Yu. N. Novichkova; National Health Institution “Scientific Clinical, Center for Postgraduate and Professional Education, Department of Additional Professional Education of Secondary and Junior Medical Personnel. - Moscow: Max Press, 2022. - 81 p.
  3. Adolescent narcology: a guide for doctors / I. N. Pyatnitskaya, N. G, Naydenova. — Moscow: Med.inform. agency, 2008. – 251 p.
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