How to start dating a guy: tips for girls

The most vibrant and romantic relationships are at the beginning. Passion, intrigue, new impressions – a whole whirlwind of feelings. But at this stage, the connection between the partners is shaky, not yet secured by mutual grinding. That's why many novels end before they even begin. No girl can insure herself against such a result.

But by following some recommendations, she will certainly be able to transform the candy-bouquet period into a long-term relationship

What does it mean

When you started dating a guy, your relationship became serious, and it could later lead to marriage. But at the moment, you need to enjoy communicating with each other and not worry about plans for the future.
Once they start dating, partners try to spend as much time as possible with each other. The girl happily accepts the young man’s offer to go to the cinema, cafe or go to nature.
Over time, a couple in love acquires a common circle of friends, then acquaintance with close relatives follows. The lovers begin to make joint plans.
The girl takes care of her partner, and she also accepts the care of her gentleman.
A couple in love pleases each other with gifts, surprises, and attentive treatment.

Be careful when dating online

Various dating sites are very popular now, and they will remain so in the near future. This means that you need to become good at understanding the people you interact with online. Always remember that we are talking about the Internet, and here a person can be anyone. Try to get to know the guy well before meeting him in real life. Find him on social media and follow him. If he uses photos other than himself on social networks, you already need to trust him less. Don't meet someone on the first day you meet them online. And if this guy inspires you and seems interesting, then meet him in a public place first just to be on the safe side.

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How to start dating

A girl must have an impeccable appearance if she wants to be noticed.
If you are in the same company, try to sometimes make eye contact with the guy you are interested in. But don't be too persistent.
Copy your loved one's poses. This will unite you with an invisible thread.
Find out about the guy's hobbies first. This way, you can invite a guy, for example, to football if he is interested in this sport.
To get a guy to like you, you need to be charming and sweet. Show that you have sympathy for him. Flirt. Men love to be flirted with. Ask the young man's opinion. It is important that he feels important.
Be natural, the same applies to your choice of makeup. There should be a minimum.
When communicating with a young man you are interested in, do not point out your level of intelligence. If your chosen one is a fairly educated guy, then you can remain yourself, but if he is an ordinary man, not erudite enough, then flaunting your knowledge may scare him away. Listen carefully to what the guy you like is saying. It is important that he feels your interest.
You need to understand that the right conversation largely determines the future of the relationship. If a guy shares his personal experiences, be sure to support him. When a young man says something, do not interrupt him.
When communicating with a gentleman, you don’t need to tell too much about yourself. Let him look forward to the next meeting so that he can communicate closer.
Stay calm and confident. If before an upcoming meeting you are overwhelmed with violent emotions, excitement, your stomach or head begins to hurt, then it is better to sit down, try to relax, turn on soothing music, or even take a relaxing bath to put your thoughts in order.
If you have a first date, prepare in advance; it is important not to be late. Think in advance about what you will wear, what hairstyle you will do, what shoes you will wear.

What not to talk about

Topics prohibited for the first meeting:

Family and children are serious for a guy. No man is ready to immediately agree to become a father, so the topic of children is prohibited.
Avoid wedding topics, even if you really want to marry this guy. Therefore, they do not start a conversation about meeting their parents momentarily.
No fantasies or plans for a future life together.
Personal past life is no one’s business, so you can’t ask about it. You also shouldn’t speak negatively about your ex-boyfriend.
You should not blame a man for your own problems, depression and complaints that he cannot resolve.
Talking about personal income and career will scare away the gentleman or the guy will consider the girl a braggart.
In no case do they talk about their own diets.
Avoid talking about intimate relationships. No hints, no warnings.

And the main thing is to never criticize a guy on the first date.

When did the relationship start?

Don't rush into a more serious relationship right away. Let everything flow by itself.
The girl should continue to remain interested in the guy and carefully choose the right words. It is unacceptable to demonstrate complete readiness and sacrifice. A young man should not think that you will do anything for him.
It is important to be honest and open; you should not put pressure on the young man.
Enjoy your relationship with your guy. Appreciate the time spent together.
A girl should always remain attractive in the eyes of a guy. Learn to change. May you have a serious mood today, a cheerful disposition tomorrow, and a shy disposition the day after tomorrow. The main thing is that the young man gets to know his partner from a new perspective every time.
You should not immediately give out all the information about yourself. A girl should be a mystery in the eyes of her lover.
Try to spend leisure time together as often as possible. If a young man invites you to go out into nature or go to the cinema, do not refuse him.
If a guy invites you to take a walk in the park, you need to think about what topics of conversation you can raise. If he asks something, answer briefly so that the young man has additional questions for you. When communicating, act casual and natural. If you notice that the guy is not interested in the topic you are talking about, change it.

How to behave correctly with a guy

We may not be able to change the environment around us, but we certainly can change our own behavior. Thanks to this, we can attract a worthy person into our lives. Below you will find 11 tips for how girls should behave with guys.

Show your confidence

There's nothing more attractive to a girl than a confident guy who knows he's good, knows what he wants in life, and is comfortable in his own skin.

The same applies to guys. They are also attracted to confident girls. To them, this is a signal that it took her some time to achieve confidence. This means that she knows how to achieve her intended goal.

So discover your strengths. Learn to be happy even when you are alone. Don't act like you're completely dependent on male attention.

2. Give him enough space without becoming a psychopath.

The right way to treat a guy is to give him space. Some girls try to keep a guy by calling him 24 hours a day, 7 days in a row.

Constantly flickering before his gaze, arranging supposedly random meetings, if it works, it doesn’t last long. Sooner or later he will be fed up with this, which means he will want to get rid of it.

The easiest way to keep a guy is to let him go. The less you try to control his every step, the more he will strive for you. Because when you trust him 100%, he will make every effort to maintain that trust.

So how should you behave with a guy?

Instead of putting pressure on him by imposing yourself on him, stop “smothering” him with your attention. The correct behavior strategy here would be to know your worth, and not to fill it. This principle is based on a clear understanding of male psychology.

Guys like it when their motivation to act is based on a personal desire or decision, and not when they are forced into it. In addition, they like to “conquer” something rather than take it for nothing.

So don't be afraid to give him time for himself, his friends, work, or whatever he needs. Make a guy chase you with your behavior! (Find out the signs by which you can understand whether a guy likes you or not).

Be feminine

Gone are the days when girls were always feminine and boys were always masculine. Now girls are becoming more and more masculine (in behavior, habits, manners), and guys behave like complete losers, without self-confidence and determination.

“A good guy is hard to find,” that’s what we girls usually say. But, according to many guys, it’s even more difficult these days to find a good, kind, affectionate, feminine girl.

Quote : Girls care less and less about themselves morally or mentally. Increasingly, taking care of yourself consists only of making your appearance attractive. They “roam” around nightclubs and streets, drinking a lot of booze (scary). It may be cool, but it's clearly not my cup of tea. A good friend is, first of all, feminine, who knows how to present herself.

From this statement it is clear that you do not have to spend all your time in the kitchen or live the life of a housewife. You just need to be a girl who knows how to teach or act more feminine.

Be with a feminine appearance, manners, habits. This is our charm and the guys want us to use it skillfully.

4. No matter how much you want it, DO NOT try to change him.

In your dreams, your chosen one appears before your eyes as a charming person - perfection itself? Believe me, you are not alone! But if it’s really important for you girls to know how to behave with a guy, then you should forget about your unfulfilled fantasies.

Otherwise, you will face constant disappointment. If you try to “re-educate” your partner, especially at the beginning of a relationship, this will lead to constant clashes.

Therefore, the smartest way is to learn to accept your young man with his shortcomings and strengths. But, if you cannot put up with his shortcomings, but he is comfortable with them, then it is better to break up.

Become helpless sometimes

One of the best rules for how to behave with a guy is to show yourself a little helpless, shy. This method responds to the inherent male instinct to “protect his woman.”

I assure you, it works great. To successfully apply this rule, use the following:

Be afraid . Simple things like fear of spiders, real or not, need to be shown openly. This will awaken in the young man the desire to protect you from all dangers. After all, protection is the basis in any relationship between a couple.

Forgetfulness . Another classic situation is to forget a sweater or jacket. Thus, he will be forced to lend you his things. This is a typical cinematic situation. But it still works.

Indecisiveness . Even if you consider yourself a confident girl, sometimes you need to show yourself to be indecisive or doubtful about certain things. Play this game while you are with him to your advantage.

This will encourage him to make a decision again. This way you create the atmosphere of the girl in need of protection that you are looking for in him.

How to behave in a relationship with a guy

Whether you agree or not, the ideal girlfriend is not only faithful, she knows how to trust her boyfriend, showing what he means to her. He needs to feel it! Therefore the following advice:

Don’t give him a reason to be jealous, but rather learn to trust

The best way to do this is not to follow his correspondence, not to double-check phone numbers, not to rummage through his address book.

When a guy feels that he is trusted, he does not resort to deception, he does not have to dodge, which means he feels good. But when there is no trust in him, he is being watched, he feels “in a cage,” so he resorts to all kinds of tricks and deception.

Remember , surveillance, mistrust, doubts or double-checks cannot deter a guy. This ultimately inevitably leads to a break in the relationship. Well, if your boyfriend is a womanizer, then it’s better to end the relationship and not torment yourself. Focus on finding a worthy person.

7. Love yourself, even when it seems like there is nothing to love

Another important tip on how to behave with a guy. Believe me, ask: “Am I fat, ugly?” 20 times a day is annoying. Stop being unsafe with your boyfriend, there's probably nothing attractive about it.

It is difficult for a guy to find a girl attractive and love her if she treats herself poorly. So do everything you can to feel great in your own body or image.

When you love yourself, you are more confident and you radiate positive energy that attracts people to you.

Every day when you look at yourself in the mirror, focus not on your shortcomings, but on what you have that is attractive. This approach can change your life. By the way, a change of image, a new hairstyle, a different makeup can help with this.

Doing good deeds and making others happy will give you more “life credit” and help you feel better. Make other people happy and you will be happier. It is so simple.

A friend who radiates positive energy, who smiles every day and enjoys life, is definitely a better girl for a guy than a lady who is sullen and always dissatisfied with herself.

The right attitude towards his friends

This is an important detail of how a girl should behave with a guy. Guys think there's nothing worse than a girlfriend who doesn't like his friends and openly complains about them.

Sure, his best friend may be an "idiot", but he still considers him his best friend. You can give your boyfriend friendly advice if you think some of his friends are bad company, but not in an aggressive way. Let him make his own decisions.

A smart girl tries to treat a guy's friends well, even just out of pure respect. She understands that the worst thing you can do in a relationship is to give the guy ultimatums so that he chooses between her and his friends. This definitely does not make a girl attractive in the eyes of a guy.

Remember , you are his girlfriend, not his mother. So by continuing to complain about his friends, you may just end up being annoying and an "ex."

How to behave correctly and nicely in this case with a guy, you ask? If you want to change his social circle, then approach it like a game of chess, not a computer strategy.

Take your time. Again, don’t destroy his “power base” - the friends he considers the only people who understand him.

The best thing to do is to encourage him to meet new interesting people to expand his social circle. Introduce him to your acquaintances and friends, inviting them to visit.

Once a young man “grows up,” he will outgrow his friends. He just won't be interested in them. And the most important thing is that the guy won’t even guess about your chess combination, since he will make the decision himself.

Think about your own life

This is the next tip on how to behave correctly with a guy in your relationship. Life is unpredictable and everything can change dramatically overnight. It is impossible to calculate everything. Today you love your boyfriend, maybe even your future husband, but tomorrow - who knows what will happen? You don't know if you will still love him in 5 years.

Things change. You change, he changes, love, affection between you can grow more and more, or vice versa, it can become less and less day by day.

That's why you must have a life outside of your relationship, so that one day you don't end up broke, a devastated, lonely lady. Therefore, you should not forget about your own life.

Try to develop yourself, become a better person, communicate and meet new people, maintain friendships and create new friendships.

This will help you not to depend on someone, either emotionally or financially. This means not falling into the trap of this psychological burden.

You need to have something that you can be truly passionate about. And believe me, it will make you as well as your relationship stronger, thus making you a better girlfriend.

Having your own life outside of your relationship is critical for the relationship to survive. Otherwise, you and your boyfriend will be too dependent on each other. This addiction can be a trap, making you weaker rather than stronger.

Be better than all his ex-girlfriends

If you don't know this yet, I'll open your eyes. Men compare everything with their past personal experiences. Unconsciously, your boyfriend also judges you based on your previous relationships.

So, how to behave with the guy you like? You need to be a better and more “ideal” girlfriend than all his ex-girlfriends combined. This does not mean at all that you need to become the “hottest”, smartest, most accessible. It's also not about looks or beauty.

You and your boyfriend may have different perceptions of beauty. Some girl may be beautiful to you, but not so in the eyes of your boyfriend and vice versa. Every person has their own idea of beauty.

The reason he's with you is probably because you're already better than his ex-girlfriends. This means continue to improve what you already possess, those qualities and virtues with which you “hooked” him.

Work on this if your goal is to make a guy fall in love with you so much that he is afraid of losing you. You should behave with a guy in such a way as to forever erase any other girl from his memory.

Never discuss his ex-girlfriends or your ex-boyfriends. Leave it behind. What matters now is you and him.

How to behave if a guy has grown cold or ignores you

He left you, and you are wondering how to behave so that he wants to come back? The best thing is to stop being his “tail” or showing yourself to be suffering. It is important!

If a guy has no desire to meet you, ask you out on a date, or he has stopped responding to your messages, then stop stalking him or imposing yourself on him. Most likely he is thinking about other things.

Maybe he returned to his ex-girlfriend or he was interested in another lady, so he forgot about you. In this case, the following rule applies: you should do the same.

Think about it, maybe you’re just not his type, so stop taking everything personally, looking for fictitious flaws in yourself. Lead a self-sufficient life, meeting with friends, reciprocating the attentions of other young people.

Then you will meet someone who will truly be passionate about you, and you will love him. Or it will strike a chord with your ex, and he will want to come back. Finally realizing that by breaking up with you, I lost more than I gained.

Possible mistakes

It is unacceptable to be overly intrusive, to demand from the guy an account of where and with whom he was

If a daughter starts dating a young man, parents worry that the relationship will not traumatize their child. It is important to know what mistakes a girl who has begun close communication with a guy can make.

It is unacceptable to dictate your terms to a young man. In fact, there are ways to unobtrusively push a guy to think about what exactly you want. For example, you shouldn’t say “I want to go to the cinema, not the theater”; it’s better to say that you’d really like to go to some movie that’s being shown in a certain cinema hall, and count on the guy himself to figure out how to take you there. Even if he doesn’t think of it, don’t throw a tantrum.
Don't make the guy wait to meet you. A girl shouldn't be late all the time. It is advisable not to linger at all. Otherwise, the young man will get the impression that you do not take him seriously enough or that you are simply an irresponsible person.
There is no need to be overly intrusive, constantly pester the guy with calls, try to control him, ask where and with whom he spent his time, why he didn’t call or come for so long. Such behavior will only scare away the young man and bring the inevitable separation closer.
There is no need to demand more serious commitments, there is no need to hint at starting a family, or planning the birth of children.
It is unacceptable to treat a young man like a child and pretend to be a caring mother. A girl should not decide what a guy can and cannot eat, what he is allowed to do and how he should not behave, especially in the presence of his friends.

Now you know the answer to the question “if you started dating men, how to behave?” The girl must understand that changes have occurred in her life, and relationships are a big responsibility, especially if she wants to maintain them for as long as possible.

How do relationships usually begin?

It doesn’t matter where you met the person you wanted to get to know better. The main thing is that he has appeared, and contact with him is necessary here and now. If the feelings are mutual, and both of you are not timid, then you can skip the initial stage and get down to business. That is, start a real serious romance.

In another case, one of the participants in the emerging relationship cannot or does not want to take a big step forward. Therefore, often a man and a woman begin to be friends: spend weekends together, go to the cinema, help each other. And all these actions smoothly lead to something more. And... They won’t lead me at all.

According to tradition, a man decides to do something to make his passion realize that he is not with her out of sporting interest. And the woman is waiting for official recognition of herself and her gentleman as a couple. Then this exciting question is asked: “Let’s meet?” Young girls usually accept the proposal with hidden glee, but experienced representatives of the fair sex begin to doubt - it somehow sounds undignified.

So what is “dating” and how to do it correctly? Let us outline the main positive components of this process:

spend time with your partner,
communicate frequently online or via SMS,
show affection and care,
engage in intimate intimacy (not necessarily sex, there can just be kisses and hugs).

Sounds good, but there is another side to the coin. Here are the negative aspects that alarm people who date:

It’s not a fact that you are the only person your partner communicates with,
uncertainty of feelings and intentions,
It is not known how long such “meetings” will last, but the years go by.

Another problem is that for men and women this concept has different, and sometimes even opposite, meanings. This is an important point, so let's look at it in more detail.

Communication

Nature has endowed representatives of the two gender groups with completely different attitudes and views on the surrounding reality. That is why, in order to understand what your chosen one is thinking or feeling, it is necessary to delve into the analysis of the level of instincts.

Guys try to take the pedestal, win the hearts of girls and feed their families. The ability to holistically understand the structure of the world helps to cope with these tasks. Their concentration on the goal is so strong that they filter out other information that is superfluous.

In addition, guys do not have the ability to flexibly perceive reality, as women do. Therefore, the main rule in the psychology of communicating with men is not to make hints, not to take words out of their context and not to rely on emotions and feelings.

I recommend directly expressing your opinions and desires. It is necessary to touch on one priority topic so that the gentleman can fully concentrate on it.

The most effective conversation will be one that is addressed to the mind and not to feelings. It will be easier to guide your chosen one to the right decision if he sees rationality in it.

Secrets of communicating with men

I will describe the most popular questions that concern any girl at the beginning of a relationship.

What to ask

I recommend talking about topics about profession, studies, hobbies and future plans for life. You can also talk about your favorite books, sports or animals. But you shouldn’t touch on “female” topics and love affairs in the early stages.

How to make a silent person talk

This is not an easy task, but the problem can be solved. Find out what his interests are: with the help of mutual friends or subscriptions to groups on social networks. If you are not knowledgeable in this area, then read the information. As you communicate, intentionally steer the conversation in the right direction. So, you will create comfortable conditions for a man, and he will be able to talk about his hobbies without stopping.

How to talk to a guy and keep the conversation going

To do this, you need to learn to ask the right questions. Avoid phrases that require a one-word answer of “yes” or “no,” otherwise you will quickly end up in awkward silence. And detailed formulations, on the contrary, will help to find other topics.

Also, make it a habit not to interrupt your interlocutor, even if you want to insert a word into the story. After all, cutting off mid-sentence means showing bad manners. In addition, you can lose the thread of the conversation, and you will not be able to find anything else to discuss when this topic is exhausted.

Ask a question

What to do if your boyfriend suddenly stops interacting

There may be many reasons for this: a new passion, loss of interest, difficulties in the service. But since, psychologically, guys are hunters, as soon as they conquer an object, they refuse to contact it.

Many men perceive falling in love as another victory, and again go looking for another victim. Therefore, during the period of communication, it is worth keeping him at a distance and fueling the fuse with changes from showing attention to indifference.

How to make contact

You should listen carefully to your interlocutor and try to understand the essence of the conversation. Don't try to show off your best side and show your intelligence through long monologues and stories about your successes and virtues. It’s better to learn how to easily communicate with men, because that’s what they look for in their chosen ones. Therefore, give up negative dialogues and discuss only good news.

How to talk about the future

The main thing is not to be persistent when talking about frankness, otherwise it will scare the guy away. But if you carefully guide him in the right direction, the partner will open up and become sincere. Start with small topics: vacation plans, goals for the near future. And then ask leading questions on the topic of interest.

How to delicately refuse communication

If the gentleman is too touchy, then you should not directly state this. It is better to keep interaction to a minimum: answer politely and not be active. Monosyllabic phrases will speed up the end of the conversation.

How to contact your ex

If you start communicating again, it is important not to remember past disappointments and grievances. Dissatisfaction, complaints and comments can provoke a quarrel. There is no need to sort things out, otherwise the hostility will only intensify.

How to Talk to a Married Gentleman

In such communication, subordination should be observed. Light flirting, hints and ambiguous jokes are a bad position. In this case, the man will think that you are hoping to become his mistress.

How to have a dialogue about children

There is one rather old joke about how to spot a real bachelor: tell him that you love him very much and want a child from him. But girls should understand that after meeting, it is not advisable to discuss with him what they will name the baby. Otherwise it can be intimidating.

It’s difficult even for experienced dating people to have a conversation about this. We come from afar, but better yet, show by actions that you are ready for offspring.

Practical psychology

There are things that are the basis for meeting and communicating between people, regardless of who wants to make a good impression on the interlocutor: a guy or a girl. Dale Carnegie and other psychologists devoted a lot of work to this. Nowadays it is often mentioned on social networks that Carnegie died alone. However, this is a distortion of the facts. It’s just that some people unconditionally believe everything that is written on the Internet without checking the information.

Let's remember what communication rules professionals talk about:

The first impression is very important. The human psyche is such that the brain evaluates a stranger in a matter of seconds and hangs a certain “label” on him. Therefore, it is very important how a girl is dressed, what kind of cosmetics she wears, how she smells, etc. This does not entirely apply specifically to communication, but the impression a guy gets about you depends on your appearance.
You need to smile more often. If a woman smiles, a man starts a monologue on a subconscious level: “Wow! She is a positive person. Finally! At least someone lives happily in this world. Surely, she won’t “burden” herself with her problems or just sit there with a sour look.” Unfortunately, in Russia people are accustomed to behaving differently from typical Americans. They smile with or without reason at acquaintances and strangers. Although there is a significant difference: the smiles of our compatriots are always more sincere. When you go on a date with a person after spending several months at home looking for a suitable guy on dating sites or VKontakte, isn’t that a reason to smile?! You need to learn. The easiest way is to practice in front of a mirror.
What you say is very important. But what should you say to a person you don’t really know yet? Everything is very simple: he needs to give him some kind of pre-prepared or spontaneous compliment. People love to be praised.
What is even more important is not what you say, but how you say it. This statement is confirmed by numerous studies and examples. If there is something wrong with diction or timbre, it’s worth working on it. You know, a declaration of love in a hysterically high voice will sound ambiguous.
Carnegie recommended, among other things, to show sincere interest in the interlocutor. We'll talk more about this later.

The above five points can truly be called the basis for creating a good first impression. Although this is clearly not enough to interest a man and, most importantly, keep him. Men are a polygamous people, they run after every skirt. Therefore, only a wise woman should make sure that the young man does not have the slightest desire to look for a relationship on the side.