According to statistics, 95% of cheaters prefer not to leave their family for their mistress, because they perfectly understand their benefit. On the one hand, there is a loving and caring wife who will feed and wash, and on the other, a passionate and attractive lover, next to whom a man feels like a hunter. But some representatives of the stronger sex still decide to leave their wife for another woman. The reasons why husbands leave for their mistresses are very multifaceted, but we will look at them all.
Why married men have mistresses: psychology of a married man
The feeling of falling in love and the instinct to preserve the family push men and women to create family unions. Sometimes people feel their loneliness so acutely that they are willing to sacrifice a lot to find their soulmate. But having found their favorite women and married them, men change their attitude towards them. After the marriage stamp appears in the passport, women are transformed from objects of worship into housekeepers, dishwashers, cooks and childcare workers. Often, communication and contact with your husband are completely absent from the list of these things. Therefore, having found the ideal wife, men begin to look for the ideal lover.
What does an ideal wife look like in a man's eyes?
- She can cook great
- She endlessly puts things in order in the family nest
- She takes good care of the children
- She gets along with her mother-in-law and other in-laws
An ideal wife in the kitchen
What does an ideal lover look like in a man’s eyes?
- She is beautiful and knows how to take care of herself
- She never has a headache and is always ready for active sex
- She doesn't walk around the house in a dirty robe and slippers.
- She does not burden the family budget with problems and children’s bad grades at school
This is what an ideal lover looks like.
Can a woman combine an ideal wife and an ideal lover? Practice shows that this task turns out to be impossible for women because, playing the role of a voluntary slave of a stove and a doormat, it turns out to be difficult for women to turn into a sex goddess.
The number of divorces due to infidelity can be reduced by doing housework together
But, if she can shift at least part of the “light housework” onto her husband’s shoulders, she will have the time and desire to do new hairstyles, facial and body skin care, and new outfits. Since it turns out to be easier and much more interesting for a man to find a woman on the side rather than relieve his wife of household work, this task remains impossible for a woman.
A woman should have the time and desire to take care of herself
Internal conflict2
Every relationship is a compromise, restrictions, rules and regulations, the need to take into account the needs of the other person, meeting his expectations. Men don't really like it. They often feel that by committing themselves to a woman forever, they lose their independence, they cannot find their true essence. Sometimes they get the impression that their life is false, that they have to pretend to be someone they are not.
Men cannot tolerate being dependent on a partner, they think that then they lose their masculinity. They leave because they cannot give up freedom, they want to be themselves. Often their escape has nothing to do with their quality of life. Unfortunately, no matter how good a man feels in a relationship, there almost always comes a time when there is a need to change and discover something new.
The question of why they leave for their mistresses poses complex and at the same time solvable problems for women. Usually a man runs away from a specific woman, from obligations, gray reality and a feeling of dissatisfaction. Often he doesn't even understand what he's looking for. He doesn't realize that he doesn't really need another woman, he needs another life. Perhaps he could satisfy his needs and desires without leaving his partner, but by improving his current relationship. But, as a rule, it is easier for a man to say “it’s over.”
Why does a married man need a mistress, what does a mistress mean to him, what does he expect from her?
The main reason why men have an affair is dissatisfaction with their sex life with their wife. It can be difficult for husbands to understand that they should not expect from a woman who spins like a squirrel in a wheel of initiative and the embodiment of a man’s desires. If a woman not only works at home, but also goes to work, then when she returns home after a day of work, picking up her children from kindergarten or school, washing the dishes, and feeding her family dinner, she dreams not of sex, but of sleep.
Active sex is incompatible with a woman's fatigue
A man, even if he went to work, but freed from household work, is full of energy and sexual desires. Many women may be surprised, but the vast majority of men, especially under 30, want sex every day or every other day. If such a schedule does not coincide with the schedule of his wife’s desires, he will look for satisfaction on the side.
As a result, by relieving a man of household work and burdening themselves, women themselves create the preconditions for their husband’s infidelity
Also, the reason that forces a man to look for a mistress may not be the quantity, but the quality of sex. Many married couples are embarrassed or afraid to discuss these topics with each other. And it’s difficult for them not only to express wishes about what they would like to get from sex, but it’s also difficult for them to talk about what they don’t like about sexual intimacy.
Spouses should be able to talk about sex with each other
What does a married man expect from his mistress?
When deciding to cheat, a man expects his mistress to satisfy his sexual needs. But having an affair involves not only sex, but also communication. If there are scandals and showdowns in the family, and the mistress knows how to listen and understand the man, then an affair on the side can lead to a divorce from his wife. Many single women, entering into a love affair with a married man, seek to divorce such a man from his wife. And to achieve this goal, they skillfully use the contrast that a man sees between his mistress and his wife.
The contrast between wife and mistress can cause divorce
How to fight back your rival and get your loved one back?
Psychologists give some advice on how to deal with a situation in which the husband has left for another young woman with things and what to do if he wants to live with her and is not going to return. If you have made a final and firm decision to forgive your husband for cheating and continue the marriage relationship, be patient and listen to our advice:
- Your forgiveness must be sincere. Throw out anger and resentment from your heart so as not to blame him during the first quarrel. Avoid any, even indirect, reminders that he once betrayed you. Do not be ironic if your rival herself broke off relations with him. A friendly attitude will help the spouse return to the family.
- Free yourself from dependence on your spouse. Don't worry that you won't be able to get a job. Convince yourself that you can do anything.
- Try to step back and not interfere with your husband's new relationship. Of course, the advice is strange, but often this behavior of the wife contributes to the quick return of her husband. The feeling of falling in love and passion is short-lived; as soon as they fade away, the man will leave his mistress and return to his family. Be that as it may, it is difficult for him to exchange you, so close, understanding, dear, with whom he has experienced so much, for something new and unknown.
- Don't let yourself go. Now is the time for self-improvement. Enjoy every new day, update your wardrobe, get a new hairstyle, go for a walk in the park, cinema, cafe more often, radiate positivity and don’t let the smile leave your face. Make your husband think that his departure did not become the end of your life, on the contrary, it inspired you. The realization that he did something stupid by leaving such a woman will bring him back.
Try not to interfere in your ex-spouse’s new relationship.
Take into account your rival’s behavior: surround your husband with warmth, attention, care, don’t make trouble or find fault.
Use cunning, admit your mistakes and ask for help to correct them: “I didn’t have enough experience and wisdom to do differently, there was something I couldn’t see. Help me improve so that when I get into a new relationship, I won’t make the same mistakes.” After such words, your husband will probably think about whether he can let you go to another man, even theoretically?
If the affair is new
If a man has recently started an affair, it is easier to cope with such a situation. Such relationships are not built on a permanent connection, but on unstable short-term feelings and passion. Usually the mistress is a young girl, fresh, attractive, sexy, with appetizing shapes, which most likely attracted your spouse. In this case, the man’s interest is determined by animal instinct; he is attracted only by sex and the external appearance of a young seductress.
The girl can enter into a relationship with him, interested in the maturity of the gentleman and, possibly, financial capabilities. In addition, a man can be fascinated by the youthful carefreeness, reckless actions and lightness of a young nymph. Unlike his wife, down-to-earth and well-studied, the new passion seems like a fairy and a mystery. This behavior is typical of men because of their psychology.
However, the illusions will be quickly destroyed if they live together for a little while. Meetings, sex, going to restaurants and movies cannot show a complete portrait of a person, and falling in love blinds.
Life together is not like a fairy tale. It is a mistake to believe that there is an ideal relationship in which lovers sleep in an embrace, eat delicious food, drink delicious alcohol and make love to their heart's content.
It is necessary to spend many years together, be able to get used to each other, learn to compromise, rejoice and be sad together, experience disappointments, cope with troubles, and be able not to waste love and mutual understanding.
You don’t need to think that everything will be perfect for your ex-spouse in a new relationship.
How long will it take for a man to be drawn home? What is the likelihood of returning to your family? Already the first days of life together between a man and his young passion are filled with everyday problems: it turns out that the couple has no common interests other than bed and a pleasant pastime, the girl does not know how to surround a man with care, fill the house with comfort, often cannot cook a basic dish or does not want to get dirty hands to wash the floor.
At the same time, she communicates with a man older than her as with a peer, being capricious and imposing her point of view.
It is in everyday life that a man discovers the true face of his mistress. It is unlikely that she will want to adapt to him and take into account his opinions and desires. It is easier for mistresses to find a way to change an unwanted man than to change their behavior for him.
But how quickly will the husband understand that family is more valuable? Tired of instability and misunderstanding, the spouse will increasingly begin to remember his former established life. In this case, the problem with the return of the spouse will be solved on its own. Another thing is whether you can forgive him for the deep wounds that he inflicted with his betrayal, even with his experiences and repentance...
The best ways to tell if your husband is cheating
If a woman has been on the side for a long time
It is a rare man who will leave the family, even if he has a permanent mistress. If he still decides to leave, think about it: most likely, the reason is you. Analyze the latest events in the family, remember every word and action of yours and his. If family life is calm and harmonious, the man will not leave you. This means that you missed that there were problems in your relationship.
The husband could commit adultery because he was dissatisfied with his relationship with his wife. Think about when something went wrong. Perhaps you have been married for a long time, there is monotony and boredom in sex, love has faded, you have neglected yourself externally and internally - such moments can force a man to cut you out of his life. Pay attention to the figure, the image as a whole and start making changes.
You have to find a solution to an important problem. Reflect on your feelings. Do you love your husband? Will you be able to forgive him and accept him back when he returns in a short time? And if your husband leaves you again, will you be able to survive it?
If you have a firm decision to resume married life with your husband, gradually surround yourself with meeting new men, but do not plan a long relationship with them. Your sexuality, charm, and male attention will make your spouse jealous and wonder whether he is ready to voluntarily give up such an interesting lady.
Usually, in the eyes of his mistress, a man is successful and worthy of trust. Surely she is ready to give birth to a child for him, maybe more than one. But often, even with a long relationship outside of marriage, the husband is in no hurry to leave the family. An angry wife herself who finds out about the betrayal can push him to leave.
If you want to save your family, take advantage of even the smallest chance. Don't make a scandal, don't throw away your husband's things, don't shout so that the neighbors can hear. Resist the urge to file for divorce right away. Anger is not the best advisor. This behavior will only make you look bad. For those around you and your children, you will appear as an unbalanced person; your husband will be sympathized with and encouraged that he left such a hysterical woman. Be calm and reasonable.
Psychology of relationships between a married man and his mistress
As a rule, a married man, when dating his mistress, does not seek a divorce and marriage to another woman. He is quite happy with a love triangle, where in the family circle he receives care from his wife, contact with his children, and from his mistress, complete satisfaction of his sexual needs. Such a double life can cause him minor remorse and a feeling of guilt towards his wife. Unfortunately, these negative emotions do not in any way affect his intentions to leave this situation unchanged.
A love triangle suits men well
A woman who acts as a mistress cannot help but feel the inferiority of her position and will strive in every possible way to change it. If the mistress insists on a divorce, and the man opposes this, the idyll between her and the married man may be disrupted. This may cause a rift between them.
A mistress may lose touch with a married man because of her desire to destroy his marriage
If you have children
If you study the statistics, abandoned women are very fond of blaming their rival for their husband’s departure and do not hesitate to manipulate with the help of children.
They forbid the cheater to communicate with the children, remind them how bad they feel without their dad, and constantly demand money. The return to the family of a man who left for another woman, only because of children, can suppress a woman. Her thoughts will be occupied by the fact that her lover has lost interest in her, there is another in his heart. As a result, the wife will set herself up to leave the unfaithful spouse herself. This will escalate the situation in the family to the limit.
The life together of spouses should not be built only for the sake of the child. A happy marriage requires love, understanding, and respect from both partners. It is unlikely that spouses will be able to live together for a long time if they are connected only by children.
During a divorce, you should not refuse alimony, even if your ex-spouse assures you that you will help the children voluntarily, and all the property remains with you. Who knows what demands the new chosen one will put forward.
It often happens that it is the mistress who turns a man against his former family and children, convincing him to stop helping the children financially. You shouldn’t show your pride as if you can completely provide for your children yourself. Whatever your income, there is no such thing as too much money.
Can a married man love both his wife and his mistress: signs
Men and women have different meanings for the word “love”. So for a woman, love can be synonymous with fidelity, devotion, a feeling of inspiration and the desire to take care of a man. And for a man, “love” can mean a willingness to have sex with a woman. Can a man be willing to have sex with more than one woman? It definitely can and even strives for this. This does not mean that every man should be suspected of adultery, with or without reason. The presumption of innocence or failure to prove a crime applies not only to hardened criminals, but also to husbands.
A sexually active man has enough love for two or more women
Why did this happen
Psychologists consider the main reason that the husband left for another woman to be the wife’s inability to manage herself after the end of the stage of falling in love. After one or two years of living together, most women dissolve their personality and their own interests in the needs of their spouse, replacing the natural desire to please the chosen one with a state of excessive care. This line of behavior leads to the fact that the husband ceases to perceive his partner as a source of emotional nourishment and involuntarily begins to look for this resource on the side.
Against the background of this factor or in addition to it, such provocateurs of rupture arise in married life as:
- decreased sexual activity of the spouse - direct or indirect avoidance of intimate relationships;
- establishing total control over the husband and the desire to limit his circle of contacts;
- inattention to the husband’s affairs, lack of interest in events occurring in his life outside the home;
- the wife’s constant nagging, eternal dissatisfaction with his actions and imputation of guilt to the spouse for various reasons;
- a woman’s humiliation of her own merits, melancholy;
- regularly making personal insults towards a partner and people close to him;
- a woman’s loss of beauty due to her lack of attention to herself;
- polygamy of the spouse (which is characterized by uncontrolled flirting on his part towards many female representatives and periodic short novels).
Even if the husband left for another woman without any explanation, this never means the action was spontaneous. Negativity has been accumulating in the family for a long time, forcing a man from time to time to seek understanding in the arms of his mistress, and the fact that one day he makes an irrevocable decision is the result of the persistent destructive work of both partners.
Can a married man be jealous of his mistress?
Jealousy or a sense of possessiveness is inherent in the relationship between a married man and his mistress. Despite the fact that in his mistress’s life he only “comes for an hour,” she may be jealous of his wife. In addition, she cannot help but understand that she is not the only one to whom such a man could turn his attention. A man is capable of being jealous of his mistress towards other men and feeling like the sultan of a harem, where every concubine is his property.
Jealousy in a love triangle
All men need is love 5
Men want love. But once their sense of freedom and independence is disrupted, they feel frustrated and lonely. Attachment to change, to eternal fun gives rise to sadness. Many men feel exactly this, sadness and loneliness, especially those who choose freedom.
Fleeting relationships are like fireworks in the sky, a lot of noise and smoke. It would seem to be a colorful sight, but it is quickly becoming a thing of the past. This is something different from the stars that are constantly in the sky. When there are many changes in the relationship of regular partners, a sense of security and trust cannot develop. In a strong relationship, partners get to know each other more and more deeply, their strengths and weaknesses. There may be quarrels, disagreements and crises, but from this they only grow up, becoming stronger and stronger.
But if you abandon the relationship, the chance for development disappears. The price of freedom can be very high. Many men find that after a while they regret it. This is a captivity from which there seems to be no way out.
Why do married men have young mistresses?
Often, middle-aged men take on young lovers in order to increase their self-esteem and increase potency if there is a tendency for it to fade. This happens because it is young women who have the strongest sexual attractiveness. They attract the attention of men, as females are capable of procreation. Here, pheromones play a role, which a young woman smells during the period of fertilization.
Young girls are able to arouse desire in older men
And again a new partner
But it is simply impossible to live for a long time with a person who is alien in spirit. And then the young mistress, at first timidly, and then more and more actively, begins to search for a new partner. After all, legally she is free, and it’s better to run away from the previous man not to nowhere, but to the next one, isn’t it? Seeing these searches (which the further they go, the less secret they become), the man begins to worry: “They told me, don’t live with a young woman, he’ll cheat anyway...” And he doesn’t understand that if they were initially connected by something besides sex , his young chosen one would not have the need to run away; and she is running away now not at all because she is not satisfied with his sexual qualities! But the offended former chosen one is unable to change the situation, which has already gone too far. And as a result, he is left with nothing: his mistress is now with a new partner, and he is left with nothing, since he once left everything to his wife.
Alena, Valery’s passion, for whom he left the family, turned out to be a good girl in all respects, despite her 25 years. When their relationship reached such a dead end, she zealously began a “different life”, getting acquainted with new candidates for her hand, heart and apartment. When Valery, touched to the quick, tried once or twice to reason with her, she eventually used a radical remedy - she caused big trouble for Valery at work. Fortunately, they worked in the same bank, where, in fact, they met. As a result, management showed Valery the door. Alena, together with her new “friend,” immediately suggested “vacating the area,” and Valery literally found himself on the street. I tried spending the night with friends, but soon it stopped making them happy. And Valery even breathed a sigh of relief when he rushed to the hospital with an attack of a stomach ulcer. But it was in his hospital bed that he felt his loneliness to the fullest. The formal care of the doctors was just the warmth he could count on now. A professor making his rounds once joked at his bedside: “You, my friend, are not recovering well. Apparently, scientifically speaking, you have no incentive to recover at all!”... And it’s true, no. Nowhere to go, no one needs it. Parents have long been dead; It’s no longer convenient to bother friends and acquaintances; It’s better not to remember about Alena at all, and especially I don’t want to repeat such experiments... And not without the help of doctors, Valery decided to return to his wife. Moreover, they never divorced.
Can a mistress be older than a man?
Yes, young, sexually inexperienced men strive to have experienced lovers older than them. If an elderly woman, in addition to successful sex, offers a young man delicious dinners, the ability to listen without getting irritated and give wise advice - such a union can be very successful.
Good sex, makeup, hair and a good meal do wonders
The reasons for her husband’s betrayal are curlers and a faded, torn robe: the husband is not handsome, but he has always cheated, why?
Many women wonder what they are doing wrong. Having given him all their youth and beauty, giving birth to him children and taking care of the family nest, such wives often completely forget that they were once just beautiful girls, followed by dozens of admirers. A couple of years later, they are simply perplexed that a man, moreover, not a handsome man or a prince charming in a white Mercedes, is cheating on them, while straightening his eternal curlers, bags under his eyes and a dirty apron with stains from the day before yesterday’s soup.
Photo from the site: zhurnal.lib.ru
In fact, everything is correct, there is a type of woman who, as soon as they get married, immediately stop looking after themselves. Their hair at home is usually in disarray, unkempt outfits, like grandma’s robe with holes, dirty nails, dull and wandering eyes and thoughts only about how many potatoes to buy for the winter. A woman in any situation should remain beautiful, well-groomed, clean for her man, no matter how many years they have lived under the same roof. Husbands usually don’t walk away from such wives, that’s a fact.
How many mistresses can a married man have?
If a man is in excellent sexual shape and wants sex every day, then the number of his mistresses can be equal to the number of times he has sex. This is a slight exaggeration of the truth, which is that for a man who has allowed himself one mistress, it is not difficult to have as many of them as his body can withstand.
A man can be absolutely happy with a love triangle
How to return your spouse to the family: tips
You have a significant advantage - knowledge of your partner’s habits, character and weaknesses. In addition, there will be time to rethink many things and actions. But you need to be prepared for the fact that the return of a husband who left the family is only half the victory. It is important to learn how to keep your marriage at the highest level so as not to lose your loved one again.
Please note: it is much easier to return the husband who left you than to prevent divorce.
Where to start:
- Understand the reason for leaving.
- Stop being a victim.
- Establish communication with your spouse.
- Reconsider intimate relationships.
- Create a better version of yourself.
- Attract the attention of other men.
An improved version of you will definitely arouse your husband's interest, and the attention of new fans will provoke jealousy. All men are owners, and this can be used to their own advantage.
When your husband returns, at first you will experience euphoria. But then calm down and the resentment may remind itself again.
That's why:
- do not reproach your husband for cheating;
- be patient. This is your best ally in this situation. You won’t be able to completely forgive and let go of an offense in a day or a month;
- learn to trust your partner again. Groundless suspicions and accusations, as well as total control, will destroy the fragile happiness that was built.
Does a man leave his family for his mistress: how often, in what cases?
In the vast majority of cases, a man does not leave his family for his mistress. Because he understands perfectly well that he is already in an excellent position. Often the initiator of a breakup is the wife who finds out about her husband’s infidelity. In this case, the man may go to his mistress against his will. He can also leave the family if his marriage is falling apart at the seams due to mutual misunderstanding between him and his wife.
Often the initiator of divorce due to her husband’s infidelity is the wife
If his mistress offers him attentive care and understanding instead of scandals in his family, he may buy into such tricks and leave his wife. If a man marries his new passion and instead of the status of “mistress,” she receives the status of “wife,” he risks repeating the failures of his first marriage, but in a more severe version, and his new wife risks getting the role of a wife waiting for her husband after the trip. to a new, more interesting woman.
The situation may repeat itself in a new marriage.
Different views on life
When starting a relationship, a husband and wife in love see a lot in common with each other. But over time, they may discover that both have changed, and in different directions. And there are no longer any common interests. You get the feeling that a complete stranger to you lives next to you, with incomprehensible interests and beliefs. This happens especially often with couples whose relationship began in their youth.
And when a man meets a woman with whom he is ready to talk about everything, he suddenly realizes that his previous relationship is weighing him down. And he leaves.
What kind of mistresses do men go to?
In order to win in a love triangle, the mistress must be many times better than the wife. Often a woman tries so hard to get closer to a man’s ideal and win that she really becomes a beauty, a smart girl and a sex goddess. The only thing a man should remember when leaving for such a woman is that she works for such an image to the limit of her capabilities and will stop straining immediately after she becomes a wife.
Every lover dreams of becoming a wife
Seven steps to a new life
So, the husband left for someone else, and how to survive this event is no longer a question. But with what goals and what opportunities to move on, it is not yet clear to the ex-wife, because everything in her life has changed dramatically. Experts recommend starting this stage with an awareness of your freedom, which opens up many new opportunities in place of one closed door. How to do it?
- Make and write down on paper a list of all the shortcomings of your ex-husband. It is necessary to remember all the episodes of his actions and the traits of his character that brought negativity to family well-being and served as a reason for quarrels. You need to carry the list with you constantly and re-read it often, feeling relieved that all these problems have resolved themselves together with your husband.
- Get a pet (preferably a dog) and devote your free time to caring for and training.
- Take up any sport or dance without skipping classes and following the necessary diet to stay in shape.
- Find yourself a new hobby that you can learn on your own by studying the necessary literature or watching video tutorials.
- Make it a habit to visit a cosmetologist and hairdresser at least once a month to always feel well-groomed and ready for new victories.
- Choose a style that matches the image you always wanted to imitate and update your wardrobe, parting with things from your old life without regret.
- Become open to communication and new acquaintances, but at the same time try to eliminate your ex-husband from your circle of good friends. They can play the role of a “damaged phone” and cause trouble.
Even if at the moment a woman does not want to think about the possibility of a new relationship, it is important for her to work for the future from the first days of forced loneliness: get enough sleep at night, maintain good physical shape, and carry out regular cosmetic procedures. After some time, when the mental pain subsides, the reflection in the mirror will show a rested girl ready for change, and starting a new life will be much easier.
In what cases do married men leave their mistresses?
Mistresses are not abandoned if they fulfill the functions assigned to them. But if a woman in the role of a mistress begins to take over the functions of a wife, that is, she makes trouble, sorts things out, refuses sex, then she receives the status of a former mistress, and the man finds a more interesting option for himself.
Men abandon mistresses who create scandals and scenes of jealousy
What to do if your husband wants to return
So, after my husband left for someone else, his life changed for the worse, and he decided that it was time to reconcile with his former life partner. The choice of behavioral tactics with which a man will try to re-enter the life of his abandoned lover will be based on his experience of communicating with her and those moments that cause a predictable reaction in her. If a woman succumbs to this provocation and goes along with her husband’s expectations, this will indicate her absolute control and make her controllable in the hands of a traitor.
Psychologists say that the only option to revive healthy relationships in the family after betrayal is to make the provocateur understand that his ex-other half is not a weak-willed victim, but a self-sufficient person who does not compromise.
A man himself must take the initiative to meet and discuss a topic that worries him, while a woman needs to pull herself together and not fly to the meeting at the first call, but call the time and place that is convenient for her. You can reschedule the date or postpone it to another date - this will be the first signal to the husband that he will have to compete for the attention of his beloved.
Is a man going through a breakup? Do men forget their former lovers?
If the separation between two people occurred by mutual consent, then it can be painless for both the man and the woman. If such people remember the time spent together, it is with slight sadness and gratitude. If the breakup was painful and on the initiative of one of the parties, then the man or woman who lost intimacy will suffer and be tormented by emotions. If the woman who left was bright, unconventional and a Personality with a capital P, then it will be impossible for a man to forget such a woman.
Men don't forget bright sex
Why men cheat on their wives: the reasons are outrageously simple
Family life is not at all a walk under the moon, along a road lined with pink petals. It consists of many components, and there is a lot of good, but there is also bad, and it may also happen that a man will be denied intimacy for a long time, which he may perceive as a personal insult. Moreover, the reasons may be very compelling, for example, the last stages of pregnancy, various illnesses, the need to travel on business, and so on, but for the offended spouse they seem far-fetched and frivolous.
Photo from the site: uznaykak.ru
In this case, the man simply does not have enough animal sex, physiology demands its own, and some representatives of the stronger sex are not particularly patient. However, it also happens that the wife does not support various experiments in the intimate sphere, and in the bedroom she has puritanical purity and chastity. Then the man can go to the left to find a partner to fulfill his cherished fantasies. Thus, to the question of why husbands cheat on their wives, psychology answers quite specifically - they simply do not have enough healthy sex, and the offended wife should start with herself before blaming her husband for everything.
How can a married man break up with his mistress?
If a man wants to leave a woman gracefully, and without causing her too much moral harm, he must think about what will fill the vacuum or emptiness that will form after his departure. The most banal, primitive, but working way to “go away unnoticed” is to introduce such a woman to a man who may be interested in a sexually anxious lady. If the vacuum is not filled, then the one who left his mistress to the mercy of fate is guaranteed to receive phone calls from his former mistress with requests to meet or “random meetings” on the street.
The best way to leave your mistress is to attract her to a new man
Love triangles or polygons existed in the distant past, exist in the present and will exist in the future as long as humanity exists. And one can only analyze and state such facts, without trying to give wonderful recipes for solving this problem.
My husband left for someone else. What to do?
The thought that her husband preferred another girl often drives a woman into a lot of complexes associated with her imaginary physical and psychological inadequacy. If the ex-wife had low self-esteem before the breakup of the family, then common mistakes in finding a way out of the situation may be alcohol oblivion or spontaneous sexual relationships. Women with a high assessment of their personality run the risk of becoming convinced of the depravity of all the men around them and thereby deliberately closing themselves off from future relationships.
In order not to lose sobriety during the period of awareness of betrayal, psychologists advise to temporarily let go of the situation and not try to correct it immediately, especially since such efforts immediately after the husband left for another are initially doomed to failure.
An approximate algorithm of actions that allows an abandoned wife to take the course of events into her own hands looks like this:
- Expression of emotions at a moment of acute experience of loneliness - this can be the destruction of photographs, letters, or even the personal belongings of the traitor left in the house.
- Completely cutting off your personality from the betrayed person - stopping communication, avoiding meetings with him and with mutual acquaintances who lack the tact to remain silent about a family tragedy.
- Drawing up a daily list of activities at work and at home to eliminate idleness in any form.
- Making a number of pleasant changes in your life - this could be a long-awaited renovation in your apartment, a trip to unfamiliar places, an exciting hobby.
Only after these four steps and obtaining the required result (moral peace of mind and self-confidence) can a woman allow herself to rethink what happened and decide how to live next.
