Who are negativists, how do they ruin the lives of themselves and other people - practical advice

Negativism is a specific behavior when a person speaks out or behaves demonstratively opposite to what is expected. Negativism can be situational or a personality trait. The psychological basis for the manifestation of the negativism pattern is a subjective attitude towards denial and disagreement with certain expectations, demands, and worldviews of individuals and social groups. Negativism can be demonstrated or have hidden forms of manifestation. Children display similar behavior in stubbornness, conflict, resistance to authority, and deviant behavior.

Initially, negativism is a psychiatric term. Active negativism is expressed in actions that deliberately contradict requests, with a passive lack of reaction at all. Referred to as symptoms of schizophrenia, possibly as a manifestation of autism.

Negativism in psychology is a feature of behavior.

What is negativism

The definition of negativism in psychology is a person’s demonstrative denial of everything that is told to him; active opposition to any, including reasonable, advice and recommendations (V. M. Semysheva, “Dictionary of terms and concepts for the course in psychology and pedagogy,” 2014).

Often, the term negativism refers to a behavioral reaction that is expressed in a tendency to refuse something, to deliberately do something contrary, or to ignore a request.

Behavioral negativism is characteristic of age-related crises (childhood, adolescence, old age).

Innate trait or personal choice

Negativism is not an innate trait, nor is it a conscious choice of a person. Negativism is formed in the course of life in an individual whose path has encountered difficulties, misunderstandings, and non-acceptance by society or loved ones.

A person becomes so disappointed in what is happening that he considers negativism as the only possible strategy of behavior.

General information

In psychology, negativism is a separate term to designate a symptom of unmotivated resistance, characterized by a disorder of will and manifested in catatonic excitement and catatonic stupor - psychopathological syndromes, accompanied by movement disorders of an inorganic nature

It is important to distinguish children from stubbornness, since it has its own reasons, and the origin of negativism reactions is unconscious. They can manifest themselves at a communicative, behavioral or deep level (do not give external manifestations)

Typically, negativism comes down to unmotivated resistance to any demands/requests to move, speak, or follow any instructions, as well as the desire to do things contrary. It causes disruption of communication, learning and, in general, adaptation in this world.

According to Kretschmer, negativism is a manifestation of the activity of hypobulic mechanisms - a mental state characterized by a reduced desire and urge to activity. Whereas Bleuler believed that unconscious resistance was a sign of autism or personality dissociation.

Children's negativism and the connection with crises

Negativity for a child is a normal manifestation of a crisis; it should go away with age.

For the first time, parents may encounter children's negativism closer to the age of three years. In psychology, this is called the 3-year crisis or the “I’m on my own” period. It is characterized by the fact that children grow up, begin to demonstrate their autonomy and independence, learn their boundaries and the boundaries of acceptable behavior with adults.

The child is capricious a lot and refuses parental help. Some parents notice that children have a desire for revenge (“You didn’t give me candy, so I’ll behave badly”).

Sometimes it manifests itself as verbal negativism, refusal to communicate. In this case, parents should show the child to a specialist to rule out serious illnesses.

How else can negativism manifest itself at the age of 3?

Negativism can manifest itself as a categorical denial of literally everything. I remember a story in which a woman asked her nephew: “Pasha, let’s go for a walk?”, to which the child answered her: “Not Pasha, let’s not go, and don’t go for a walk.”

Rules for parents

To easily survive age-related negativism, parents must raise their child correctly:

• Unconditional love. The child should feel that he is loved not for his merits, but just like that.
• Actions. It is not the child himself who needs to be condemned, but his actions. At the same time, it is always easy to explain why this cannot be done.
• Example. Children perceive “live” information better. Leading by example will be the most effective way of healthy behavior.
• Good conquers evil. A child must learn this rule in childhood. When he gets angry, you need to hug him, calm him down, turn the situation around.
• No pressure. Under no circumstances should you suppress a child. Suppressed aggression goes deeper and only gets stronger over time.

Teenage negativism

Teenage negative behavior is most pronounced. It is typical for the ages of 13-16 years, and with proper behavior by adults it gradually goes away. Often, adults resort to the help of a psychologist to correct the behavior of a typical growing up rebel.

Often teenage negativism is expressed in the desire to change appearance. A boy may declare that he intends to grow his hair, and a girl may paint herself in bright colors or shave her head bald.

While there's nothing wrong with lipstick and casual clothing, parents should pay extra attention to who their children hang out with. Teenage negativism is expressed in early sexual intercourse, drinking alcohol, smoking, and communicating with bad companies.

Recently, dangerous challenges have begun to spread among teenagers: running across the road in the wrong place, stealing something from a store, not going to school for a week, etc.

Parents are confused

Not all parents can immediately understand what exactly is happening to their children, who were so sweet and obedient just yesterday. The difficult period of adaptation to schooling is behind us, all the strengths and weaknesses are already known, conclusions have been drawn, it seems that life has just returned to a calm direction. An eleven-year-old child is little different from a ten-year-old in the eyes of his parents. The first bells do not look scary at all. Well, a child lost his temper—it doesn’t happen to anyone. Suddenly he snapped out of the blue - you never know, maybe he had a fight with a friend or was just tired. Suddenly he flatly refused to eat any dish or put on something that just recently he most likely would not have noticed at all. Individual taste awakens - this is normal.

Usually parents begin to notice a problem when the process has already gone too far. There are too many annoying misunderstandings, and they can no longer be attributed to objective reasons or individual characteristics. Notes of negativity begin to dominate in relationships. Whatever the notes are, situations are becoming rather rare when teenagers are not irritated, something has not offended them, they see no reason to object and criticize anything. Any little things suddenly become extremely important, and mainly in order to express your displeasure. Family relationships become a difficult test for all relatives.

Reasons for negativism

Negative behavior is usually characterized by the following reasons:

1. For a long time, a person felt forgotten, lonely, abandoned, helpless.
2. Inability to overcome failures, perceiving them as a personal tragedy, and not something from which one can learn and become better in the future.
3. Resentment towards a specific person, a feeling of all-consuming hatred towards him.
4. The desire to attract people's attention, a kind of request for care.
5. The desire to assert oneself, to gain respect in society, a team or a company.

This is based on unstable, inadequate self-esteem, often low. Lack of understanding of one’s values, the meaning of existence, lack of goals and aspirations. Because of this, a person does not feel a sense of support, his condition is always unstable, he feels threatened and vulnerable.

Consequences of the behavior pattern

The influence of negativism on a person and his life is very detrimental:

1. Impaired social interaction.
2. They refuse to communicate with a negativist, since people simply do not have the strength to endure his constant despondency, complaints, and mournful appearance.
3. Severance of working relationships, because negativists are stubborn, it is difficult to come to an agreement with them.
4. Internal conflicts, the inability to understand oneself, one’s true desires and needs.
5. Distrust of other people, excessive skepticism.
6. Receiving criticism.
7. Learned helplessness (a person does not believe that he will succeed, so he does not try).

How do you feel about people who regularly demonstrate negativity? Share your experience of communicating with negativists in the comments.

Signs of psychological maturity

• Naturalness, spontaneity and liveliness of emotions. The ability to freely and respectfully express your feelings and needs. Understanding and accepting social norms and the ability to integrate with your interests.

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• Favoring genuine and respectful behavior rather than open confrontation. Accepting yourself and people without trying to change someone.
• There is an idea about your meaning in life. And a smooth movement towards achieving this goal, which contributes to the constant improvement of one’s skills, knowledge, and professionalism.
• The desire for long-term and sincere relationships. Knowing yourself and the other in these relationships.
• Humor and lightness towards your failures. The ability not to complicate the situation, but to make fun of yourself. Caring attitude towards yourself and others.

How to get rid of negativism - strategies

Negativism can ruin a person’s life, deprive them of many acquaintances, wonderful moments and opportunities. There are several strategies to overcome quality.

Learn to give thanks

Gratitude is the best way to overcome negativism. To do this, it is important to notice the good and concentrate on it. Many people remember only the feeling of sleepiness in the morning, traffic jams, and the rush to work. Nobody notices beautiful clouds, bizarre winter landscapes and the smiles of rare passers-by. But if you concentrate on the good, your mood will improve significantly.

It won’t be possible to notice good things right away. Keeping an observation diary will help with this, where a person can record all the events that brought pleasure during the day (fragrant morning coffee, listening to your favorite music on the way to work, a conversation with a good-natured old man near the entrance). The main thing is to record what happened as simply and specifically as possible.

At the end of each week or month, ask yourself what event was the most exciting, what brought the most positive emotions.

Drive away negative thoughts

If a person notices the need to whine, complain and be upset about what is happening, then it is worth driving away sad thoughts, try to find at least something good in the situation (the weather is bad, the boss is unhappy again, colleagues are gossiping, but there is an opportunity to earn money, buy what you want).

The “Yes, but” technique will help you change a negative attitude to a positive one and look at the situation from a different angle.

Silence is gold

It is worth making a rule that if you have nothing to say (kind, good, supportive), then it is better to remain silent than to give negative, rude comments.

Think beforehand

If there is a need to speak out in a negative way, then there is no need to endure (especially if a person’s rights are violated or his dignity is harmed). However, before you burst into an angry speech, you should go through the dialogue in your head, structure the speech in such a way that it does not contain rudeness or personal insults.

You can calmly say about your feelings, “I’m annoyed,” rather than “You’re annoying me.” You can criticize a person’s actions, “This is not the first time you’ve been late, let’s think about how to solve this,” but you cannot offend the person’s personality, “You’re always late, you’re not punctual and generally unreliable.”

Look for positive emotions

It is important for a person with negativism to work on his emotional background and restore it. To do this, you need to do something that brings you pleasure or communicate with cheerful, cheerful people, adopting positive behavior experience from them.

The following techniques on the site will help you add color to your life: “Dreams Come True”, “Living Look” and “Stop a Moment”.

Don't compare yourself to others

If you constantly evaluate your successes in comparison with other people, then there is a risk of always being a loser. You only need to compare yourself with yourself. Each person has his own individual start in life, opportunities, resources and needs.

Release your own negativity

You shouldn’t keep negative emotions inside, you can effectively throw them out. It is only important to find a way that suits you (draw your negativity, scream in a vacant lot, dance a crazy dance, do an intense workout in the gym). More information about this can be found in the article on anger.

Change beliefs

The beliefs and stereotypes in our heads shape our reality. It's like filters through which we pass everything we see. Do you know the parable about the fly and the bee? A bee flies and sees flowers in the field, but a fly only sees dung. Our reality is made up of beliefs.

You need to write down all negative beliefs on a piece of paper and replace them with positive ones. For example,

• “Everyone who hasn’t graduated from college is stupid” should be replaced with “In general, I know talented guys after college who have achieved a lot.”
• “The state is to blame for everything” should be replaced with “I heard that a plastic processing plant was recently launched in the region, and benefits for families were increased.”
• “The rich are arrogant” should be replaced with “Many wealthy people are open to help and communication.”

It’s worth changing your beliefs to real ones. There’s no need to make things up, your brain won’t believe it anyway. The task is to really see that in addition to negative attitudes, there are also positive ones, and it’s up to you to decide how to relate to what is happening.

What to do if loved ones are negative

A negative person nearby makes life very difficult, ruins your mood, and deprives you of positivity. The situation is complicated by the fact that this comes from a loved one, with whom it is impossible to break off the relationship. But you can do the following:

1. Do not hesitate to tactfully interrupt the streams of whining, complaints about life and anger. Make it clear that this is not interesting.
2. There is no need to endlessly encourage, reassure or offer a solution to the problem. It is enough to do this once. If a person does not use advice and does not accept the help of others, then being a negativist is his life, conscious choice.
3. Answer as briefly and concisely as possible, and do not show interest in the dialogue.
4. Clarify with the negativist the purpose of the conversation. If he wants support and valuable advice, he can continue. If he just needs to complain, then let him find another person for this purpose.

How do you behave with negative relatives? Share your life hacks and techniques in the comments, it will help our readers.

Pathogenesis

There is no consensus on the pathogenesis of catatonia. Studies have shown that disruption of communication between cortical structures, the thalamus and the basal ganglia play an important role in the occurrence of catatonic symptoms, therefore, in addition to clinical assessment, when studying catatonia, it is worth taking into account the results of neuroimaging and neuropsychological examinations. The hypothesis is based on a lack of gamma-aminobutyric acid (GABA) in the basal ganglia. Normally, GABA reduces the intensity of emotional reactions, such as anger, fear or anxiety.

In modern literature, there are often cases of catatonia caused by abrupt withdrawal of drugs used to treat catatonic states and accompanying mental disorders. This therapy uses mechanisms to increase GABA activity in the basal ganglia, which has a positive therapeutic effect. With abrupt withdrawal of drugs, an increase in motor symptoms often occurs (the phenomenon of “rebound catatonia”).

It is possible that catatonia develops as a result of severe anxiety, in response to stress. Therefore, scientists suggest that catatonic states are directly related to affective and other mental disorders that are accompanied by symptoms of severe anxiety.

Prevention is the best way to prevent a problem

To prevent negativism from subjugating a person’s life, you need to:

1. It’s trite, but establish your own daily routine (get enough sleep, exercise, set aside time for rest, eat nutritiously).
2. Maintain trusting relationships with loved ones, do not hesitate to ask for support and help if necessary.
3. Protect yourself from sad events, especially from those in which a person is powerless (set up a news feed, refuse to watch “heavy” TV shows, do not take the words of negativists to heart).
4. Protect yourself from stressful events (and if an exciting situation is ahead, then organize yourself a good rest after it).
5. Surround yourself with honest, positive, enthusiastic people, adopt their healthy habits.

Thank you for reading the article. Negativism is something that can destroy a person’s life, make it gray and dull, but we all sometimes fall into this state. The main thing is to learn to stop in time. What do you think about negativism? Do you think it is typical for you? Share your thoughts in the comments.

Send the article to your family and friends, bookmark it, so that at the first sign of negativity you can return to exercise and stop it.

Diagnostics

Negativism is diagnosed in psychology using psychological tests and questionnaires. These methods allow not only to identify the symptom, but also to identify other negative thinking disorders. Diagnosis can be carried out in both children and adults, but most often children's negativism is observed.