Would you like to know how to get a girl to ask you out on a date? Why not let her take the lead?
In the world we live in, there is still a belief that men should make the first move.
But we live in the 21st century! Women work, earn a lot of money, buy their own things, so why can’t they take the first step?
You can help them become the ones who take the first step. Put the reins of control into her hands by learning how to get a girl to ask you out.
Let's sum it up
After reading the article, you will receive practical advice and learn how to ask a girl to date in an original way. The result will be positive if you carefully study all the points and are able to recognize hints from the girl. You don’t need to become hysterical when rejected, the girl is not guilty of anything in front of you, you can offer her a relationship at the wrong moment, or she will simply be in a bad mood. Only constant work on yourself will allow you to understand people well, take a couple of courses and improve your skills. Show up in public more and your communication and dating skills will begin to develop. Keep at it and you will succeed.
How to get a girl who doesn't want a relationship with you
It happens that ordinary courtship does not help to achieve the girl’s attention and it turns out that she does not want a relationship. To find out how to woo a girl who doesn’t want a relationship with you, you need to find out what caused her decision. Usually, the reasons that force a girl to talk about her unpreparedness or unwillingness for a relationship are deeply intimate, so try to slow down the pace of courtship and become for her someone with whom sincere spiritual intimacy is possible, to whom she can open up about such a topic. In the process of such excavation of the truth, it may become clear that she has no desire to get involved with you, then there is no point in moving beyond friendly relations. And if she is wary or even negative (this will be accompanied by characteristic facial expressions and statements) about the relationship in principle, because she has recently experienced a difficult breakup, has been severely traumatized mentally in a relationship for a long time, or physically now does not have the opportunity to communicate with someone else (study, work, courses, treatment, etc.), then the situation can be corrected with your efforts and patience.
If a girl is very attractive, you are ready to help her and you don’t know how long to wait for this, then learn to be a good friend who can listen and cheer, help and at the same time not absorb all her time space.
Over time, you will get to know each other in more detail and better than couples who start out on dates, because friendship is the key to a strong relationship. Once she gets used to your constant presence, gently invite her somewhere. On the first such evening, you shouldn’t have a candlelit dinner, come with a huge bouquet and propose to meet her, kissing her at the door of the house. Just take a walk, have fun in a way that interests both of you (planning such a day, knowing the person well, is quite simple). And after several such dates, when such spending time together becomes habitual, you can gradually add romance.
The result of your friendship can be anything, remain understanding and respect the girl’s decision. It’s great if everything worked out for you and, thanks to your efforts, you were able to overcome certain psychological difficulties of the young lady. And if not, then there is no point in spending a lot of time hoping for changes, other than wasting mental resources. It may happen that you will forever remain only a good friend who helped get through difficult times and restored faith in men, and she will be the first to share the good news with you that she has found the love of her life. This is a rather painful blow, but remember why you made such unconventional efforts - to get the girl as a trophy or to make her happy, guided by your love?
Important points
Now I propose to talk about direct communication with the young lady. Take your time. You shouldn’t rudely try to take a girl. Act gradually, measuredly
To begin with, it is very important to achieve trust and respect for each other. So don't be another boyfriend who just wants to have fun
Show her that your intentions are extremely serious.
Don't hesitate before being rejected. Courage is the quality of a real man. If she didn't agree to go out for coffee with you one time, that's okay. Maybe she’s stuck at work right now or she doesn’t yet see you as a future prince. This can be fixed. Try again, but in a different way.
Don’t miss the opportunity to show that you also communicate with other young ladies, but make her stand out from the rest. She will see that you are popular among the ladies and this will attract her even more.
Don't forget about your sense of humor. Making a girl laugh is an art. But this is exactly what will help you gain her favor. The joke should not be obscene, vulgar or angular. If you're not good at improvising yet, prepare a few jokes in advance and use them at the right moment.
Sincerity is your strong point. Women are good at feeling lies, even the most insignificant ones. If you don't want to talk about something, it's better to say so. Your honesty will be highly appreciated. After all, love is impossible without the sincerity of partners.
One of my clients met a wonderful guy. He told her amazing things about himself, which over time turned out to be a terrible and well-thought-out lie. I think there is no need to explain that now this young man is in the former category.
Pay attention to little things and details. Remember her eye color, favorite cafe, book, movie, music
Get to know her, be sincerely interested in her life. This will show your attitude towards her.
Don't stop flirting and making advances with her. You can learn this in the article “The Art of Flirting.” Such a little thing can help maintain a relationship even after many years.
Don't try to play the role of someone else. Many guys believe that they need to show themselves as busy and unavailable and that it will definitely work. This method may ultimately work against you. Feigned inaccessibility will most likely be regarded as indifference.
Share your emotions and experiences. Just tell her how your day went and ask her what interesting things happened. Light and sincere conversations help people get closer, get to know each other better, and get into each other.
Make friends with her friends and family. Remember when her mom and dad's birthday is. Such moments are extremely important for girls. After all, young ladies are extremely sentimental creatures.
What does a woman want?
You don’t need to conduct a survey to find out what girls expect from a man. Ask any lady how to win a woman, and she will give you an approximate list of the most attractive qualities for the majority of the fair sex:
- pleasant appearance,
- ability to carry on a conversation,
- desire to earn money,
- politeness and gallantry,
- good sense of humour,
- patience for women's whims,
- tirelessness in bed.
“Such a huge list, I went...”, you will say and you will be right, but only partly. We all strive for the ideal, but we fall in love with flawed people, with all their pros and cons. Therefore, it may not be worth taking the generally accepted requirements of girls too seriously, but it is quite possible to learn something from them for yourself. Let us generalize and draw a conclusion from women’s claims regarding the candidacy of a real man:
- Mutual care is the basis of healthy relationships. Women love it when they are treated like a treasure: they take care of their health, pamper them, look after them and support them. Such behavior on the part of a man significantly increases the chance of success in the further development of the relationship. A girl who is treated this way will reciprocate in 90% of cases. And you yourself will feel like a real gentleman, the master of the situation and a kind of benefactor. Your lady's grateful eyes will say a lot.
- No to rude people, yes to respect in a couple! You may not be a prince on a white horse and you will never become one, but you simply must show respect, restrain aggression and not be rude. This is one of the most important requirements for men, which must be strictly observed. Do you want to create a harmonious couple?
- Sloths are not particularly successful with women. Many young people dream of marrying an oligarch. But in reality, they are looking for at least those men whom they can rely on in difficult times. Think for yourself how many worries the average woman takes on: comfort in the home and cooking, caring for children and husband, and almost everyone works! I really don’t want to take on the burden of supporting an adult capable man. That's why ladies choose hard-working guys with the desire to get ahead.
These are the key points that girls pay attention to when choosing a partner. Of course, there is love at first sight, when ladies lose their heads over a handsome man without a king in his head
But relationships based on momentary sympathy are unlikely to last long. Therefore, develop in the right directions and you will be successful with any girl.
Is it worth pursuing a girl if she refuses a relationship?
Before you start actively seeking recognition from a particular person, determine for yourself whether you need to pursue the girl who refused. After all, refusal due to reluctance to build something joint specifically with you or because it is a kind of game aimed at gaining more power over you are fundamentally different. Also listen to yourself, what drives your desire to achieve this girl. If this is strong love and the desire to always be with her, then perseverance and desire will help you. And when this interest is dictated by the fact that the girl is outwardly attractive (and you don’t know anything else) or by the fact that this is unattainable prey and the hunter’s instinct is triggered in you, it is better to leave this idea of competition.
To woo a girl who refused a relationship, you need to analyze why this happened. Remember what she complained about or what she argued about. It often happens that young ladies are offended by the lack of banal courtship. All beautiful creatures want flowers, beautiful words, broad gestures, so that even a deaf-blind person can see that you love this girl and very much. Give her gifts and surprises, do funny and bright things (shout to the whole street about your feelings, come to her window on a white horse) - the brighter and crazier it seems to you, the greater the possible effect it will have on the girl.
If the reason for the refusal was a lack of time, then reconsider your schedule and organize it in such a way as to be as present as possible in the life of your chosen one (develop and finish work by the end of the working day, monitor the quality so as not to redo it on the weekend). And when you can’t be physically close, send her an SMS with some positive or funny content, not forgetting to tell her how much you miss her.
Work on what was the reason for the refusal, and if you don’t have such facts on hand, and your lady is accustomed to your appearance at her first call and 24-hour attention, which means it is beneficial for her to keep you in this role, then move away for a while . This will be a definite shake-up for her, making it clear that you no longer intend to indulge the continuation of a relationship of this type, and she will have to choose between having you in her life as an official companion or accepting your absence. Most likely, in a couple of days she will get bored without you, because she is used to your constant attention, and she will appear at your place. At this moment, the main thing is to maintain what has been achieved and not slide back into the friend zone.
Your own feelings will help you decide whether to pursue a rejected girl or leave her alone. Sometimes the inner confidence that it is worth continuing is so strong and unshakable that, despite the logical contradiction of facts and the futility of the situation, everything turns out great. But the opposite situation is also true, when everyone can persuade you to try again, because she “almost agree” does not find a response and such confidence in your soul, the attempt may be a failure.
How long it takes to continue pursuing a girl after refusal depends on the strength of your feelings and the capabilities of your nervous system. Some people can’t stand it for a week, while others easily continue unrequited courtship for twenty years, devoting their entire lives to this woman and missing the opportunity to build their happiness with others.
It all depends on the zodiac sign
Astrology is not a science, because there are no constellations. There are many psychological aspects in drawing up a horoscope.
If a guy believes in the horoscope and is interested in how to behave with a girl so that she falls in love with you, he needs to pay attention to the following recommendations:
- Aries loves energetic, strong and confident guys. The main criteria are intelligence and charisma. A man must soberly assess his chances, since next to such a woman he will always have to grow and develop.
- Taurus prefers reliable men. A woman born under this sign does not like noisy and talkative guys. She may like someone who knows how to repair and manage a household.
- Geminis love witty guys who have an easy and stress-free lifestyle. A man should prepare for their frivolity.
- Cancer prefers confident guys who have either achieved great success or are on their way to achieving it.
- The Leo woman loves men who constantly put her on a pedestal.
- Libras prefer intellectuals.
- Sagittarius likes guys who embrace matriarchy. They are very authoritarian.
- Scorpios prefer smart and serious men.
- Capricorns like trustworthy, emotionally stable men.
- Aquarians like erudite people.
- Pisces prefer charismatic intellectuals.
You can truly make a girl fall in love with you even on the first date. At the same time, common interests and respect for each other are important.
Useful advice from psychologists
When a guy doesn’t know how to woo a girl, especially one who doesn’t want a relationship, he’s ready to listen to the opinion of psychologists. They recommend being strong-willed and persistent, avoiding empty words, showing signs of attention, giving gifts and, most surprisingly, feeding.
The will to win
A guy's persistence in winning a woman's heart isn't just about getting dates. It manifests itself in writing messages wishing good night, making calls to inquire about the mood, plans or wish a good day. After hearing many refusals from dates, it’s still worth trying to invite her again.
Instead of a thousand words
Girls can't stand it when guys talk sweetly, promise mountains of flowers, take a star from the sky and bathe it in gold, but in reality they won't even give you one flower.
Often such relationships do not last, today he promises to take you to a restaurant, tomorrow he says that he has business and the restaurant is postponed, and the day after tomorrow he does not call at all. Nice words are needed, but not empty promises. Words must be confirmed by actions if you really like the chosen one.
Scarlet flower
Choosing gifts is always difficult, especially when you want to win a lady. Lately, everyone wants to stand out and make the gift unique, which sometimes becomes funny and absurd.
There's no need to complicate things. It is enough to be attentive and hear what your beloved is talking about. If she loves to read and told you that her library is missing a certain book, then she will appreciate it if a guy finds it and gives it to him.
Feed-praise
Many women watch their figure, but despite this, they love to eat delicious food. Even if the lady is on a diet or a vegetarian, you can invite her to a specialized restaurant or cafe. During the date, there will be an opportunity to discuss interesting topics.
The most common mistakes in seduction
It is difficult to avoid mistakes in the process of seducing a girl. But there is no need to be upset, because this speaks of personal development. Guys often make the following mistakes:
- they try to build trust early, bypassing the stages of attracting attention and interest;
- they put themselves above the chosen one, and this leads to loss;
- they indulge their friend in everything, being afraid to say about their desire;
- They expect a return in the form of emotions and attention, forgetting about the law that no one owes anyone anything.
Having interested your beloved, you can achieve her favor. Trying to be brave, persistent, charming and strong-willed, you will be able to seduce her faster and easier.
Appearance
How do experienced men win women? They never forget to tidy up their appearance
It is worth noting that men pay attention to their clothes and hairstyle no less often than women. Many representatives of the fair sex always try to look not just neat, but also impeccable
In earlier times, a fashionable wardrobe was the preserve of only a select few. Today the situation has changed. A real man will always be careful about his clothing. Especially when it comes to the lady of the heart. After all, when a man needs to win a woman, he is unlikely to appear in front of her in sweatpants with outstretched knees, worn out shoes and clothes fastened with the wrong buttons.
Of course, sometimes mutual love comes suddenly, as they say, at first sight. All this is simply wonderful and allows you to not have to try to win someone over. However, such love occurs quite rarely. Moreover, it may be unlikely that the people were unkemptly dressed.
For a man who is captivated by the beauty of a woman, but has not yet had time to get to know her, it is very important to make a favorable impression on her at the first meeting. This will save him from the need to try to assure the lady in the future that he will certainly become a good husband and father
His main task will be to conquer a woman at first sight, and then gradually turn her into a person with whom she would like to connect her destiny.
When creating his image, a man must emphasize all the advantages that his appearance has
After all, a lady will pay attention to a man much faster if she notices the coincidence of styles in her and his clothes. It's quite simple to explain
Many women believe that a partner should suit them not only spiritually, but also externally. That is why ladies sometimes spend quite a lot of time to choose a companion who would become an ideal soul mate in all aspects of life.
Why do men conquer women? Yes, because they don’t put off indefinitely a visit to a professional hairdresser who will recommend a hairstyle that is ideal for the created image. In addition, they make sure to choose beautiful clothes that they can afford. Anyone who doesn't know how to create their own style is advised to turn to a professional.
If a man is neat in his clothes, has well-groomed nails, hair and skin, then the chance of conquering the woman he likes is very high. In addition, it is worth keeping in mind that the only smell that others should smell from a man is the aroma of expensive perfume. In this case, it is necessary that the selected notes of eau de toilette or cologne ideally combine with the style of clothing created by the image, as well as with the time of day and year. It is worth remembering that appearance is the calling card of any person. That is why every man should choose the perfect look for himself.