Why you're unlucky in love and what to do to be lucky

For many, the desire to be needed and build good relationships turns into the question, why are you unlucky in love? This is especially true for formally prosperous and attractive individuals. If a person has many problems, he is socially disadvantaged, then questions about the problems of his personal life are not surprising, but when beautiful and promising, smart and erudite people cannot create something strong and harmonious over and over again, then it is worth finding the reasons for such misunderstandings.

Usually, all the problems in the sphere of relationships are not in the external environment, events or partners, but in the personal characteristics and psychological traumas of the unlucky person, and possibly in the lack of examples of successful interaction. Some do not know how to set priorities or have impairments in social and personal interaction. There are differences for those who fail to have a first romance and who get divorced for the fourth time, so the reasons may differ depending on gender, but still the main problem will be in personality traits or established habits.

Why is a girl unlucky in love?

Girls may find it impossible to build a love relationship because they initially have inflated demands on their chosen one.
Many people are told from childhood that they need a good boy, they read fairy tales about princes, and they inflate their self-esteem, despite their real merits. But good boys are not real, and the best girl is so spoiled that she is disgusting. Most beautiful women consider love as an investment and demand mountains of gold from their partners for their appearance. Those who believed in their parents’ words of praise can be very burned by the fact that there are more beautiful, smart girls in the world, while still having normal self-esteem and kindness. Personal inflated demands do not allow one to see a real person, and if self-esteem is greatly reduced, then the girl does not believe that she is loved, perceiving this either as a mockery or as a prelude to exploitation.

Any biased attitude is dictated by a high level of anxiety. Only the construction of a pre-selected picture, demands on a person and the reluctance to see him in truth with slight surprise, exploring a new world, leads to the same demands from him. The more sketchy the attitude towards the guy, the more sketchy he will be towards her, and then regrets about insincerity will come.

Fear also has a strong influence, here everyone has their own reasons - some are afraid of being abandoned or hearing unflattering reviews, others are afraid that after a date they will ruin their reputation with gossip, some are afraid to open up and let people approach them. As a result, personality and needs are hidden, and the girl tries to please, please, predict, but it is impossible to interest her with a mask. The more games there are in building relationships, the shorter the romance.

Mistrust

Everyone knows that Taurus behave a little distantly and coldly with almost everyone around them. The only exceptions are those people who live with them under the same roof and close friends with whom they have known since childhood.

Here Taurus show all their peacefulness, affection and tenderness that they are capable of.

But in order to start and maintain personal relationships with the opposite sex, you will have to let someone new into your life. And it is extremely difficult for representatives of this zodiac sign to do this.

It may take a very long time before they start to trust a girl or guy

And they, in turn, are not always able to understand the slowness and caution of Taurus and cannot wait for mutual manifestations of feelings

Bad luck with money can be associated with saying certain phrases

Money is a strong energy substance, which, if mishandled or unsightly phrases spoken in relation to it, can cause a person to be offended. Before voicing out loud words such as, for example: “I won’t hunch over these pennies” or “Damn this money.” Such benefits of modernity can easily be removed from a person if he does not address them with respect or expresses them incompetently.

Finance loves trepidation and care. Even a small sum is better than empty pockets. Whatever a person’s earnings, it is worth being grateful to them. There are magical ways to attract funds. But even this method will not give the long-awaited result. The most important thing is that if you have problems with money, reconsider your attitude towards them. Otherwise, all possible finances will bypass the person in every possible way.

Domestic goats

They are so smart, educated and spiritually beautiful, and how they cook! Men like this are always willing to run in for a meal or sincerely help them with their everyday life. Goats never swear and don’t know what the B-52 is made of, for which they are extremely loved by moms and dads, and are also passionate about psychological literature and know at least 20 ways to steam a turkey. Men come to “goats” for one-time sex in desperation (out of boredom, a girlfriend has left her, she is leaving for permanent residence) or they return to them with a hand and a heart at the age of 35, having suffered with other female types.

Come back, I'll make you ice cream, I'll just wash your face!

How to get rid of bad luck and failures with the help of a Slavic conspiracy

You can get rid of failures using other methods. This ritual is recommended to be performed only on Saturday evening. Try to make sure that no one distracts you during it. Go to the shower and, standing under the ice-cold water, say: “Forget me.” Then make the water a little warmer and again, standing in the shower, say: “Away with me!” The next time, increasing the temperature, say: “Keep me out of here!” And the last time, under the hottest water possible, you need to say: “Keep away from me, get out of here!” Wash away from my life with water!” Without drying yourself with a towel, immediately go to the mirror, throw an unnecessary rag on the floor and, standing on it, say:

“As water flows and drips from me, so do adversity leave me. I admire myself in the reflection and utter magic words. May there be happiness and good luck in my life. I’m leaving all the idle rumors behind me, opening a new life.”

Once dry, hide it in a bag, and late at night take it as far from the house as possible or hide it in the ground.

Women misinterpret the word "decency"

Most mothers who raise their daughters in the spirit of decency instill the wrong values ​​in their heads. They do everything so that they grow up to be overly modest, educated, well-read, and always with a sense of duty and guilt.

The girl finds confirmation of her mother’s science in fairy tales and cartoons, the basis of which revolves around the fact that princes always find good and docile girls, quickly marry them and give them a heavenly life. Yes, there are princes, but the heavenly life does not shine for everyone. Often it all ends with these same Cinderellas sitting and yearning, realizing that the fairy tale ended immediately after the wedding, and the prince turned into... you know who.

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But my friend, who from an early age did not think much about decency and lived the way she wanted, has settled down much better - she continues to enjoy everything that happens.

Why do I have bad luck all the time, what is the reason

There are people whose whole life is a complete nightmare. Something constantly happens to them, bad luck haunts them, their health fails, even the people around them notice strange things. Surely such losers often wonder: why are they unlucky all the time? To understand this, you need to find out the reason behind bad luck, and then think about how to deal with this reason.

As we wrote earlier, the reason for bad luck may be the evil eye or damage

Perhaps someone did it carelessly or intentionally. Everyone is familiar with the picture of young parents walking with a small child in a stroller.

This is the time when an acquaintance comes up to them and begins to praise the child, and then spits figuratively or literally, so as not to jinx it. Sometimes people, without meaning to, praise someone for their beautiful appearance or some successes, and then everything they praised for begins to collapse with incredible force.

What is the reason for bad luck? One of the reasons is the person himself. Perhaps we are talking about an overly passive person who, due to his laziness or unwillingness to do anything on his own, cannot achieve anything in his life. At the same time, excessive gullibility is the best reason for selfish people to benefit.

To avoid being the cause of trouble yourself, start working as soon as possible. Do you often lose money, phones, keys and other items? Be more attentive and careful, check your pockets and bags to make sure everything is in place. Are people taking advantage of you and deceiving you, even your friends don’t care about you? Work on your character, find that inner core within yourself and don’t forget about self-respect. No rise up the career ladder? Try to be more hardworking and goal-oriented.

If you are unlucky in life, then probably the reason may be hidden in the subconscious. Some people make everyone the culprit except themselves: parents, friends, bosses, animals, I even blame everything on brownies. If you constantly instill bad thoughts and set yourself up for failure, then nothing good will come of it. Instead, repeat that difficulties are temporary, with perseverance everything will definitely work out.

The beginning of all troubles often lies in the surrounding circumstances. Are things not going well financially? Try changing your job or type of activity, find something you like. Your personal life isn't going well and you can't find a life partner? Reconsider your views on relationships. It is possible that some kind of barrier has been built in the form of high standards and expectations. Be simpler in communication and develop yourself to be an interesting interlocutor. Don’t be afraid to take the first steps, both towards everything new and on the way to new acquaintances. Uncertainty will only attract failure, but winners overcome everything.

Reasons why you have no luck with girls

Men complain less often, but they are interested in why they have no luck in their personal lives with girls. What both sexes have in common is growing up among individuals with cross-gender issues, and while it is more common for girls to choose the wrong person, men suffer more from the inability to start a relationship

Here it is important to trace the role of the mother, as the first woman who can hold her son so tightly next to her, especially if she is without a husband, that there is simply nowhere to insert the appearance of a companion either in terms of energy or free time space. All girls can be unworthy or materialistic; over time, this position becomes internal to the man himself and, meeting another woman, he immediately sees only her shortcomings

A critical attitude, searching for flaws, testing, moralizing - this is not what you can start a relationship with. Instant falling in love, where it is impossible to notice that the girl ignores signs of sympathy, openly sends a suitor. These are problems with the basic function of reality testing, which leads to illogical actions.

Complexes paralyze men because there is a stable myth about the necessary confidence, security and other qualities of genius. Seeing a good girl, a guy can be so demanding of himself that he won’t approach her, considering himself unworthy

Such men very skillfully attribute active attention from the fair sex to friendship, the desire of girls to cheer him up or take pity on him

The fear of showing one’s courage is largely paralyzed by feminist movements, when a man no longer knows whether he can pay for dinner, pick up a lady, protect her from a rude word, or whether this will be regarded as humiliation or harassment. Girls enjoy male strength, masculinity and the opportunity to be weak and not decide anything. The more a man asks what a woman wants, the more he buries himself, because it is better to offer at least some options. The less he bothers her, so as not to intrude and respect personal space, the more likely it is that someone more confident will appear in this freed-up space.

Guys rarely go to psychologists, increasingly looking for answers on forums and in magazines, but the stories do not apply to him and his girlfriend, and advice is often given by the same losers, because those who have a family are busy with it, and not with writing answers . You need to figure it out individually and not listen to template advice, as it may not work or create a bad reputation.

Dissatisfaction with yourself

Low self-esteem, numerous complexes, general dissatisfaction with oneself is a scourge that not only prevents you from meeting girls and being liked by guys, but can also completely ruin relationships that have already begun. Soothing news from psychologists - everyone without exception has complexes. It’s just different for everyone and not everyone realizes them. You can and definitely should work with them. Some will disappear quickly, while others will have to be dealt with for years.

You need to understand that accepting and loving yourself is not selfishness, but an extreme necessity. “Love your neighbor as yourself,” says the Bible. How can you love someone if you couldn’t even love yourself? You risk falling into a dependent relationship: “be sure to continue to adore me so that I can be at peace with myself.” This is a heavy burden for a partner; he is not obliged to be responsible for your inner world.

Correct love for one's neighbor comes from an excess of self-love. Incorrect, flawed, leading to a breakdown in relationships - due to its lack. And in order not to play too much to the point of narcissism, try to treat yourself, for example, like a caring mother to her child.

Bad luck in your personal life

It very rarely happens that the same individual is chronically unlucky in all areas of life. It happens much more often that failures haunt a person either in business or in his personal life. Moreover, bad luck in your personal life can negatively affect other areas of a person’s life. A lack of positive emotions, primarily love, leads to a decrease in labor productivity, the appearance of health problems, a violation of goal setting and incorrectly setting life priorities.

Why you have no luck in your personal life, reasons:

• infantilism (the result of unsuccessful parenting);
• underestimation of oneself;
• fear of new relationships;
• self-hypnosis.

Bad luck in men's personal lives

The reasons for male loneliness are varied, the most common are:

1. Unsuccessful previous experience. Disappointment in a relationship greatly reduces a man’s self-esteem and awakens numerous complexes: isolation, misogyny, misogyny and others.
2. The statement that girls are only interested in material values. Such a conclusion, as a rule, comes from unsuccessful previous relationships, in which the man suffered significant material losses, and the woman did not appreciate his efforts. At the same time, it is not always the lady who demands expensive gifts; sometimes the guy tries to buy love in this way, and in case of failure, accuses the woman of commercialism.
3. Uncertainty in the intimate sphere. Lack of experience, certain physical characteristics, previous failure or a negative reaction from a partner make a man doubt his abilities.
4. Reluctance to adapt to life with another person. Such reluctance is found in older men who have left positive experiences of living together in the past (widowers) or so-called old bachelors.

A sea of ​​bad luck

Bad luck in women's personal lives

Some girls have too high self-esteem and set high demands on men. Each woman has her own ideas about male ideality, and inconsistency with these ideals gives rise to disappointment in the stronger half of humanity and classifying oneself as a loser.

Why girls are haunted by failures in their personal lives, reasons:

1. They are expecting to meet a rich groom. As a rule, young people have not yet accumulated their capital, and wealthy men of advanced age usually have a family that they will provide for in the event of a divorce. Therefore, girls should not expect an instant solution to material problems at the expense of a rich husband, but choose a promising, ambitious young man and create family capital with him.
2. Failed relationships in the past. Women's emotionality and sensitivity do not allow them to quickly overcome disappointment and believe in themselves, and realize their right to a happy personal life. Before entering into a new relationship, a woman analyzes her mistakes and builds her life according to her own rules.
3. Fear of intimate relationships. Some girls are embarrassed by their imperfect appearance, consider themselves not very beautiful and are afraid of male ridicule. Some women who have experienced sexual violence develop a psychological barrier that only a psychologist or a very loving and patient man can cope with.
4. Some divorced women (and not only) do not consider a new relationship with a man vital. They enjoy solitude, independence and self-reliance.

Total bad luck

To get rid of bad luck in your personal life, psychologists recommend:

• analyze parental attitudes and reconsider some life positions;
• accept yourself as an adult responsible for your life;
• do not ignore dating sites and social networks;
• gain confidence in your abilities and your attractiveness;
• constantly monitor your appearance and health;
• do not be afraid of dating and conversations with representatives of the opposite sex;
• communicate naturally, do not show off your inexperience or, conversely, your experience;
• expand your horizons, show interest in art;
• travel and learn foreign languages;
• devote more time to your hobby;
• don't be afraid to experiment.

Getting rid of bad luck

Thus, a person is to blame for constant bad luck. Until he realizes that no one will bring him all the blessings of life on a platter, and success and luck do not fall from heaven, the streak of bad luck will not end. It’s not for nothing that a quote from folk wisdom says: “Whoever fights for happiness, that’s where it tends.”

How to change your life for the better?

The first step with which you will begin to make big changes:

• Find your starting point (honestly with yourself).
• Understand where you are now, in what position (you can burst into tears, beat a pillow, scream).
• Accept the fact that you created all this with your own hands, and only you are able to change the current situation.

Come and look in the mirror. What do you see there?

Our world is a huge mirror. Imagine that you are standing in front of your reflection.

Here you are screaming with all your might. But it turns out that you are shouting at yourself. Yes Yes! At your reflection in the mirror. You are simply trapped.

Do you sincerely wish for it to move differently?

Then start smiling, at least looking at yourself. Act as if you are already happy! After all, there is no reason to think why I am unlucky.

Focus on the positive. Let a beautiful sunny morning be a reason for smile and joy. Delicious breakfast, favorite strong coffee, stylish clothes

Start with the little things, and then you won’t have time to pay attention to the problems.

One of my friends made it a habit to replace the word “problem” with the word “task”. And it becomes much easier to perceive and solve problems.

Do you want to travel? Ask questions. What does a person who is going on vacation do? How is he feeling? What are his thoughts and plans?

Do you want the world to become a better place? Believe me, he will get better. But only when you start with yourself. First of all, from the thoughts in your head.

Self-confidence

Leo will never show his weakness. Even if he is afraid of something in his soul, you cannot tell by his appearance.

When they go out in public, they seem to put on a mantle of confidence and success. Thanks to this, they often achieve high success in all their endeavors.

And yet, in their personal lives, such excessive self-confidence turns out to be an unpleasant side for them. Leos do not tolerate:

• they were told what and how to do, they themselves are able to schedule your work and home schedule minute by minute;
• they were limited in their desires and needs, their desire is the law of the Universe and it cannot be otherwise;
• imposed someone else's opinion - they have their own and it is much more correct.

If Leos please their loved ones with signs of attention or gifts, then only when they themselves wish it.

And most of the time, the partner will have to fulfill all the whims of the representative of this zodiac sign and completely submit to his will. Otherwise, the relationship will end very quickly.

Children's stereotypes

Many people inherit their parents’ pattern of behavior when choosing a partner and building relationships. As children grow up, the attitude model of the mother or father is deposited on a subconscious level. So, if the father was a drunkard or a tyrant, then the woman will encounter precisely such men in the future. Lonely and frustrated women, completely frustrated in relationships, set an example for their children and instill negative attitudes.

“Unloved” children especially suffer in adulthood. They are not told kind words, are not given gifts, but can be scolded for any reason. Already from childhood, the child develops a feeling of his own inferiority and uselessness. If such a person starts a relationship with a partner and it doesn’t work out, he blames himself. What excuses do people come up with for their own partner who drinks, smokes and leads an antisocial lifestyle?

Children's stereotypes make them underestimate themselves and overestimate their partners. But there is only one life, and you need to live it for your own pleasure, achieving your goals and desires. You should not pay attention to the wrong partners, especially if from the first days of meeting they show their bad habits and do not suit you according to all criteria. It is not necessary to live the way your parents did - everyone builds their own future.

If the relationship begins to copy the negative experiences of the parents, you need to stop and think about why this is happening. There is no point in blaming yourself for the fact that it is impossible to meet a worthy person. It is necessary to realize your individuality, which gives you the right to decide your destiny. Getting rid of stereotypes imposed in childhood will not be easy and sometimes this requires long-term work with a psychologist.

Tell me where and what do you live for?2

Of course you are worthy of a prince. But let's be honest, he won't look into your industrial area on the outskirts of the city. And the neighborhood guys with a bottle of cheap beer will not strive to create a strong family and earn money for their house in Miami. They don’t need this, and they don’t know how to do it, they haven’t been taught.

What to do? Make an honest list of qualities that your ideal guy should have. Just don’t need “car, apartment, dacha, yacht, million dollars.” You can simply become a prostitute and meet just such a man for an hour. Only he will take drugs and beat you half to death. We're talking about what you really value. The ability and effort to earn money, not a million from your parents. Are you willing to bend over backwards for a new car or is it more important for you not to work as a constant lightning rod?

After that, analyze where you can meet such a person? In a good sports club, at an exhibition or in a volunteer organization. Don’t sit at home watching TV, watching a series about another Cinderella. It’s better to look at information on social networks and take part in a bike ride or environmental event. Typically, 15 to 30% of these events are single guys.

Where to start improving your life? Methods that work!

So, how will we fix everything:

1. We get rid of what is not beautiful or necessary. Garbage, unloved things and unnecessary trash. You need to clear your space, it helps to restore order in your head as well.
2. After spring cleaning, we surround ourselves with beauty. We make a list, everyone will have their own. Clothes that make you feel your best. And at home too! Decorative elements, even the smallest ones, that make your heart feel warm and good. Photos of loved ones. Delicious and desirable food on chic tableware. At home, at work, on the street. Every day!
3. Create your own colorful world full of pleasures!
4. Visualize your desires. Imagine what you want in the smallest detail, and everything will definitely come true.

Don’t put it in reserve, don’t put it on the mezzanine. Use everything that can bring smiles and pleasure TODAY. After all, today is no less unique than a birthday or December 31st.

Change your approach

You can hear the phrase “I have no luck with girls” from many modern guys. We ask in response:

- And what are you doing? Do you meet people on the street, in clubs, in theaters? - No. —Are you inviting anyone on a date? - No. - Well, do you at least correspond with anyone on the Internet? - Also no. - So how can you be lucky when you do nothing?

This is, of course, an extreme example. Most people, even those who have been unlucky in everything for a long time, still make some effort, but often it comes down to endless repetition of one chosen pattern. This is called “an attempt for show”; it is used by those who subconsciously want to blame the responsibility for their problems on “bad luck”. That is, there was a formal attempt, maybe not just one, but 10, this gives the right to say “I tried, but I wasn’t lucky.” In fact, using the same obviously unworkable scheme is not an attempt, but an excuse.

Who to choose

The problem in building close relationships and connections for Leos is also in choosing a successful partner. On the one hand, they need someone who will agree to be their “shadow”, who will be satisfied with the second modest role next to the pedestal.

On the other hand, Leos will be unpleasant to see a companion who is completely uninteresting, either externally or internally. That is, the partner, one way or another, must evoke the admiration of others and be some kind of object that can be boasted of, like an expensive car or exquisite jewelry.

But at the same time, the “other half” cannot overshadow Leo himself. And it can be very difficult to achieve a combination of both in life.

How to become more successful

To be successful, you must recognize opportunity when it comes and grab it. To do this, you need to learn to see connections that others do not notice, train logical thinking, attentiveness and insight, broaden your horizons, develop self-confidence and courage. We tell you how to do this.

Argue

The ability to prove your position develops logic. When selecting arguments, we analyze causes and consequences, and notice non-obvious connections between people, events and objects. But there is no need to constantly run into arguments: you can ruin relationships with family, friends or colleagues. It is better to train in discussion clubs or debates, where your desire to express your point of view will be supported by everyone present.

Ask

Choose any random object and ask yourself three questions about it: “What is it?”, “How does it work?” and “Why is this happening?” Answer them clearly and logically. If you can't, Google it. You will be surprised how many interesting things around you you haven’t noticed before.

Play

To develop logic, you can do it the old fashioned way: solve puzzles, play chess, or play solitaire. Or you can boost your brain with a high-quality computer game. The main thing is not to get too carried away: 30 minutes a day is enough for training.

Richard Wiseman proposed another exercise that develops luck. You need to do something at least once a week that you haven’t gotten around to doing before, or something that for some reason you didn’t want to try. The daily routine can be tiring, and stepping out of your comfort zone will increase your chances of getting lucky in life.

Luck smiles only on those who do not sit still and are not afraid to try new things. A good way to practice your luck is to take part in the New Year's Russian Lotto draw, where a billion rubles are guaranteed to be won. It only takes a couple of clicks to buy a ticket. Who knows, maybe you will become the first lottery billionaire in Russia? I'll be lucky!

Infantilism

Or maybe it’s just too early for you to build a relationship? Are you sure you're old enough for this? Don't look at your passport - there is no true answer to this question. The inability to take responsibility for your life is the main sign that you have not yet left childhood. And, unfortunately, this problem can last a lifetime.

If you seriously believe that your partner owes you something: to surround you with comfort, solve all problems, provide money or delicious food with ironed shirts, then, perhaps, you cannot do without the help of specialists.

The inability to get out of the influence of parents also applies here. Adults, seemingly men and women, often turn out to be unsuited to independent decisions and actions. By the way, psychologists consider infantilism one of the personality disorders that requires professional correction.

What to do if you recognize yourself

First, rejoice: if you have tracked one of these scenarios in yourself, it means that the problem of personal happiness has already been half solved. “I also recommend working through the reasons described above on your own or with a therapist. Study the topic “The Five Love Languages.” Understand what your and your partner’s love language is, find ways to give enough love and attention to each other,” sums up Veronika Sysoeva.

The main thing is to be ready for changes and look into the future with optimism.