What to write to a guy to get acquainted: the theory of an effective start

• 4393
• 14-01-2022
• Author: Mysekret Team
• 0

Today it is much easier to meet a guy or man you like, because all you have to do is write to him on the Internet. No need to look for a phone number as before, visit the same cafes and shops to meet by chance...

True, such simplicity has not simplified dating at all, since many girls and women are still embarrassed to write first, or do not know where to start a conversation in order to please a guy/man.

We have collected a number of tips, as well as the correct expressions that will help to attract a guy, interest him and awaken his desire to further communicate and meet.

Preparatory work: before you write

Before surfing the vastness of a dating site, check if everything is in order with your virtual face - a profile that, like the right dress, should emphasize your strengths and hide your flaws. We have already discussed in detail how to fill out a profile for a girl on a dating site in order to leave a clear, succinct and vivid impression of yourself. Read it.

She put herself in order - with the attention of a tracker, she studied the profile of the guy to whom she was about to write, with desperately sparkling eyes. You need to know the enemy by sight. Any profile on a dating site, except an empty one, provides a lot of useful information. In particular, it answers the question of what words to write to a guy first. Cling to the information kindly provided.

If you want to ask for forgiveness

There are situations when you should ask for forgiveness from someone you offended.

Example phrases:

“Don’t be angry, life is too short to waste it on grudges. I'm sorry".

“I’m very sorry that this happened. Our relationship is important to me. Right now, more than anything else, I want to make peace with you.”

“The reason for our quarrel is insignificant compared to my feelings for you. “I will try to improve and not allow such situations to happen again.”

“Let’s forget the ridiculous grievances and leave our quarrel in the past.”

“I had a lot of time to understand my mistake and admit my guilt. I'm very worried about what happened. Please forgive me".

What to write to the guy you like: set goals

While you're wondering what you can write to a guy, I'll ask you this question: is goal setting an important condition for success? And I’ll answer right away: yes. The destination is the point of arrival. A goal is a clearly formulated desire. Having decided on a goal, you look for (and usually find) means (words) to achieve it. Without a goal, you go somewhere and end up somewhere. Like in the fairy tale about Alice.

- Tell me, please, where should I go from here?

-Where do you want to go? – answered the Cat.

“I don’t care...” said Alice.

“Then it doesn’t matter where you go,” said the Cat.

Don't be Alice. Set transparent goals. Be aware of why you are wasting precious time on dating sites. Are you looking for a partner for what? For example, go to galleries, engage in tantric sex, create a social unit. Each goal has its own style of communication. By the way, what a manner it is to write first. I've probably asked this question a hundred times already.

Unusual options

Unusual options for what words you can use to please a guy by correspondence are:

Through correspondence, it can be difficult for girls to express their emotions, support or cheer up a guy.
This is due to the fact that, without seeing the facial expression of your opponent, it is not always possible to accurately interpret his mood and reaction to specific words. Despite the existing risk of aggravating the young man’s condition by untimely changing the direction of the conversation, in the vast majority of cases, words of support, regardless of their form, significantly improve a man’s mood and strengthen the emotional connection with his chosen one.

Why it’s important to write first: the benefits of initiative

Writing first on dating sites, contrary to the stereotype “the man should make the first step,” is a commercially profitable event. Firstly, there are few girls who “write first”, and the attitude towards them is appropriate - the same reverent attitude as towards rare precious metals. Secondly, you gain the opportunity to choose among EVERYONE, and not among those who wrote to you (admit it, more than 90% of those who wrote are guys of low social demand). Thirdly, this is a useful skill in every sense - to take, and not wait. Once you become skilled at dating sites, you can use them everywhere.

If you haven't seen each other for a long time

Separation is a difficult time for lovers and those who simply like each other. Warm words and gentle messages significantly shorten the distance and help brighten up a difficult time:

“Surprisingly, time passes very quickly when you are around, and it drags on very painfully in your absence.”

“The breakup made me realize how strong my feelings for you are.”

“I never thought I’d miss those dirty mugs you regularly leave in the sink.”

“Today on my way to work I met several couples in love. I sincerely envy them."

What to write to a guy first: simple ways to impress

Now dip your pen into the inkwell and write. And although the banal “Hello, how are you,” uttered through the lips of a woman, loses its sophistication and acquires a fresh flirtatiousness, it’s worth using your brain to not just catch attention, but to make a lasting impression. This is easy to do with a compliment.

The Power of a Compliment

It’s quite strange that so few women use a simple way to win over any man on a dating site - give a compliment. The compliment should be light and relevant. Leave the eloquence of the times of the Egyptian pharaohs in the bins of your rich spiritual world. “Your eagle gaze pierced my trembling heart” - something like that will at best cause a smile, and sometimes it can even offend the interlocutor.

Men like it when their tribal advantages are emphasized - sexuality, strength, will: “I’ve never seen such expressive biceps!”, “Who gave you such an amazing smile?”, “I want to make sure that handsome guys are interesting conversationalists. Can you help?”, “I don’t know what is more in you - magnetism or romance, but you are definitely not like others.” Praise those virtues that exist in reality, and not ghostly. Talking to a slight guy about biceps is, to say the least, merciless.

Common denominator

You can approach from the other side. Like a springboard, start from common points. “Hello! I saw your photos from Tbilisi. I'm just planning to go there. I want to ask a few questions about the city and your impressions. Do you mind?”, “I also often visit this park, but I’ve never seen you. How could I miss it?”, “Is this luxurious Doberman yours? I always dreamed of having a dog. Is it true that Dobermans, contrary to popular belief about their aggressiveness, are friendly and peaceful?”

Life hack from a psychologist

To feel confident in any situation, not just on a dating site, adopt the following life hack. If you don’t know how to start or maintain a conversation, ask questions. Firstly, you will save your interlocutor from the headache of what to say so that the conversation flows like a babbling stream. Secondly, the question form of communication will emphasize your focus on him.

Should I write SMS during the day if the guy (man) is busy with work?

Some girls are confused by the question of whether it is worth writing pleasant SMS during the day, when the guy may have work or personal matters. Sometimes such SMS, even in the midst of a working day, will come in handy; they help you to distract yourself for a minute, cheer up and lift your spirits.

Therefore, if a girl does not write too often and actively when her man is busy with work, then there will be nothing wrong with such SMS.

Pleasant encouraging words to a man will be very good, especially if his working day promises to be hard and eventful. You can write that you believe in him and wish him an easy and productive day, or that you are looking forward to your meeting in the evening.

It’s never too much to support, so don’t be shy to please him with your positive thoughts and faith in your beloved man.

Unexpected pleasant SMS are also good in the case when the guy does not work and the day is completely free. This way you can entertain him a little and brighten up everyday boredom. In any case, you will please him with your attention and remind him of yourself, strengthening your relationship with a touch of positivity.

Phrases for meeting a guy on the Internet: TOP-100

Continuing the conversation about women's initiative, there are many examples on the topic “don’t sit like a pretty girl, but write first.” Here's what you can write to a guy so as not to cross the fine line between light flirting and indecent behavior.

1. I'm a journalist. I'm conducting a survey for a dating site. Can I ask you a few questions? The first one is how do you feel about girls who meet you first?
2. I read that a person needs to use 70 muscles to smile. I suggest you start downloading them right now. Smile and let's get acquainted!
3. I'm choosing cufflinks as a gift for my dad. Can you help? Such a stylish young man should understand this.
4. What ties are in fashion now? I need to buy a gift for my brother, but I know ties like I know screwdrivers.
5. Do you know what an electric discharge is? This is what happened when I looked at your photo.
6. You look like the guy I saw in my dream recently. True, he was not alone, but with a white horse. Isn't that you?
7. Can you tell me how to change spark plugs/oil in “any make of car”?
8. I pressed something on the computer keyboard and everything went dark. What could it be?
9. Do you really think that the Internet is a place where serious relationships can begin?
10. Why is such a spectacular guy looking for a girlfriend on the Internet? I'm sure in real life girls follow you in droves.
11. I want to make sure that a handsome guy can be an interesting conversationalist. Can you help?
12. You are like a wild animal - brave, smart and daring. And yet it seems to me that I can tame you.
13. I want to ask you one question - what can you write to the guy you like?
14. Why is he so thoughtful in the photo? Don't be sad. Life is wonderful. If only because I exist.
15. I want to watch a movie in the evening. Can you recommend anything? It seems to me that you are well versed in cinema and more.
16. Tell me some book. I can’t choose, and you look like a well-read young man.
17. I also like this park (city, horse riding). I wonder what else we are similar to?
18. It's amazing how a simple photograph can convey so much emotion.
19. I have never met a man with such a deep gaze. I'm impressed.
20. There are so many secrets in these beautiful eyes. Will you share one of them with me?
21. Before I saw you, I only read about alpha males in magazines.
22. You look as if you are hugging them. It immediately becomes warm.”
23. Such a look... Having seen it, neither income, nor education, nor the presence of bad habits no longer matters.
24. You look great. Do you have an innate sense of taste or do you follow trends?
25. Hello. I've been looking for you everywhere for so long. And you, it turns out, are here.
26. I saw your profile, and now I have one question that worries me...
27. It seems to me, or did you actually act in some kind of movie?
28. Probably girls often invite you for a walk to the registry office?
29. Tell me how can I please one charming guy on this dating site?
30. What do you think is more important for a girl - to be beautiful or smart? Which ones do you prefer?
31. How do you like the news that “the plot of the latest news (for example, the ruble exchange rate has fallen significantly)”?
32. Do you believe in love at first sight or do you prefer to take a closer look?
33. I wonder if such a romantic young man listens to the voice of his heart or reason?
34. Do you think it's worth making decisions based on intuition?
35. Name your favorite movie. Maybe that's what I'll watch tonight.
36. Have you been told that you make a lasting impression on girls?
37. You've probably been told a thousand times that you're beautiful. But it’s also nice to hear for the thousand and first time, isn’t it?
38. They invited me to my uncle's birthday party. Can you tell me what I can give as a gift?
39. The guys are well versed in technology. Maybe you can help me choose headphones/player/phone?
40. Do you think love is relevant or already a relic of the past?
41. If you had the chance to become a woman for a while, what would you do first?
42. Could you call me on my mobile? I lost it and can't find it.
43. If you had a time machine, where would you like to go?
44. Do you love popping bubbles on a packaging bag as much as I do?
45. Are you seriously considering this site as a resource for finding a girl?
46. I wonder, has such a serious man ever done crazy things?
47. And what brings you here?
48. Do you want me to cheer you up?
49. Are you by any chance the guy of my dreams?
50. How do you feel about women's initiative?
51. Why do men like stupid girls?
52. How long have you been stealing women's hearts?
53. Your smile makes me lose my sanity.
54. You look like a purebred cat. I just want to pet you.
55. The sky, a tree, a supermarket wall…. What do you see from the window?
56. I have problems with my eyes. I can’t tear them away from your profile.
57. Hello. We need a man's opinion on one issue. Can you help me?
58. Oh, have you been to “city/place name”? And how did you like it there?
59. Let's skip the official part of getting to know each other and move on to the more important part.
60. Maybe we can get to know each other after all, or will we just silently look through each other’s profiles?
61. I have a feeling that after looking at my profile, you didn’t know how to approach me. So, I decided to help you.
62. I thought for a long time about a good phrase to start dating, but decided not to complicate it. Let's get to know each other without boring buzzwords?
63. How about communication without obligations?
64. What do you think we have in common?
65. There are advantages, but what about the disadvantages?
66. I would like to know more about you than just your name.
67. Wondering what's behind this beautiful façade?
68. You have an x-ray look. I guess you can't hide anything from you?
69. You have a luxurious look. Now it's your turn to compliment.
70. Could you explain to me one of the rules of the road?
71. I am a guest from the future and was sent to the “dating site” to make your life better and happier.
72. I'm writing an article about online dating. Can I ask you a couple of questions?
73. I'm writing a book about how to meet a guy. Your independent opinion is interesting.
74. Your presence here turns the other guys into faceless masses.
75. You create the impression of a fortress in which you can find shelter and feel safe.
76. Young man, you have hurt my heart, and now you are obligated to provide me with medical attention.
77. I promised my cat that today I would meet the most handsome guy on the site.
78. They say that initiative is punishable, and at the same time it is better to regret what was done than what was not done. Shall we meet?
79. With such a man you don't even need a blanket. You are so warm!
80. I get embarrassed when you look at me and don't write anything.
81. Would you like to take me to a cafe one evening?
82. Young man, can you tell me if you like me?
83. Can you lead me out of the labyrinth of loneliness?
84. I'm drowning looking into your eyes. Rescue us urgently!
85. So this is what a magnetic gaze is...
86. I've never seen such expressive cheekbones.
87. Is it true that all men are polygamous?
88. You can even go to a desert island.
89. What attracts you most in girls?
90. Tell me, how does a screwdriver differ from a drill?
91. If tomorrow is the end of the world, what would you do today?
92. I feel that you are not like everyone else. I want to understand why.
93. Do you think money can buy happiness?
94. Did you know that reproduction in space is impossible?
95. I dreamed about Freud today. What do you think that would mean?
96. They say that a trainer's wife gets sugar after good sex!
97. Do you also think that female logic incapacitates the male psyche?
98. I wonder why men shake the gun in the tank after refueling their car?
99. What happens if you press the gas and brake at the same time in a car?
100. I wonder if you fold or scatter your socks?

Cheer on VK

You can cheer up a guy by correspondence not only using SMS, but also during communication on VKontakte. The advantage of using this method is the opportunity to leave your message not only in a private message, but also to make a confession publicly (by writing text on the wall of the young man’s account).

You can cheer up a man on VKontakte in several ways:

• Describe a real (or fictitious) funny story that happened to the girl herself or someone she knew the other day.
• Send a gift with a funny message attached to it. Despite the fact that in the vast majority of cases VKontakte gifts are paid, they cost no more than 50 rubles.
• Send a funny picture with a phrase that the young man will understand. If there is no suitable option in the public domain, you can make such a picture yourself on free sites.

  
  You can cheer up a pen pal by sending him a funny postcard.

• Send a funny video or video that matches the interests of a particular young person. Videos can be selected from those previously downloaded on VKontakte or downloaded yourself from other resources.
• Send a personal video message. The girl records the video herself. If the girl is too shy and uptight to record such an appeal, you can record a voice appeal, voicing a confession or telling a joke in this way.

It is recommended to choose the message structure in accordance with the algorithm:

1. Understand whether the message should have a loving connotation, be a confession, or simply act as friendly support.
2. Determine the purpose of the message (to support, cheer, confess feelings, etc.).
3. Choose an appropriate time (for example, a young man’s lunch break).
4. Find a template that can be used as the basis for a future message (if the girl plans to send text in a VKontakte message).

Options for text messages on a social network can be:

What next: how to keep his attention and interest

In principle, to attract the attention of a guy on a dating site, you don’t need much intelligence. Pleasant appearance and unobtrusive initiative are enough. But to prevent interest from evaporating at the speed of boiling water, maintain the right degree.

• Do not expose the urgent need for communication and anxiety about its absence. “Where did you go”, “Why don’t you write”, “I’m waiting for your answer” - phrases for defeat.
• Talk mostly about him - everyone likes to be talked about. Speak, but don't talk. Don't pretend to be a Real Madrid fan if you don't know what a penalty is.
• A good tip is to ask for help. Men like women who ask for help. This makes them feel courageous and smart, that is, they feel superior. “I’m choosing a lawn mower for my father’s birthday – do you think Makita or Husqvarna is better?” “I got (game name) as a gift, but I can’t get past level seven! You are a cool gamer. Help me out!” (if he is a cool gamer).

Remember that communication for the sake of communication has no practical meaning if the purpose of your stay on dating sites is not to stretch your fingers. As soon as you are convinced of the adequacy and safety of your partner, go real. Everything interesting happens there.

How to write SMS to your beloved guy or tricks of SMS correspondence

When corresponding with your loved one, be sure to use cute nicknames or affectionate words, with the help of which you will add personality to your message and emphasize that you wrote it with tenderness.

SMS should be such that a person always has something to answer.

There is no need to write in monosyllables and in the same type, forcing the young man to guess what you wanted to say with this message. Guys have a hard time accepting these kinds of hints, so it’s better to communicate openly. But they take compliments in SMS very well, so you shouldn’t skimp on small praises.

Today it is no longer fashionable for a girl to be stupid, so try not to make mistakes so that your SMS, instead of falling into the heart of a gentleman, does not end up in the domain of humorous portals and forums. If you’re going to “make a mistake,” then make a big one!

For example, you can send a message of the following nature: “Music, I kiss you! Thank you for caring so much about me.” Now we are waiting for a reaction. Even if it doesn’t follow because the young man is still in a stupor, after half an hour you need to “douse him with a bucket of cold water” and write: “Sorry, I wanted to send an SMS to my mother, but you’re in my address book next to me, and I I accidentally picked up your contact. I’m really uncomfortable.”

The same thing can be said with your voice, you just need to rehearse the embarrassed intonation. If the guy expresses frustration, you can add: “Actually, you can be a real music guy too,” or something like that.

Results: 5 important rules for interesting and effective correspondence

In the meantime, while you are here and not there, download into the unconscious the basic rules (without rules, nowhere) of interesting and effective correspondence.

Rule 1. The main thing is to start

The first rule of communication on a dating site is to start a conversation. We found out that the problem of what to write to a guy first does not exist. You can indicate your interest with a banal “Hello”, testing the waters to see if your partner makes contact or only likes blondes (when you are a brunette). Or go to a higher level - compliments and immersion.

Rule 2. Be meaningful

Literary talent is an advantage, but without the right stuff, a sense of language is meaningless. Men are a different audience. They don't like beautiful quotes. The important thing is not how, but what to write to a guy to interest him. Be a brilliant communicator. Here's a recipe from Lisa Kirk: "A gossip is someone who talks to you about others, a bore is someone who talks to you about himself, and a brilliant conversationalist is someone who talks to you about you."

Rule 3. Be correct

His ins and outs don't concern you yet. Hold back questions about your financial situation, the number of divorces, and a history of hemorrhoids. At this stage of dating, skeletons in the closet are not considered. You can arrange an interrogation with passion later. For example, before setting off to Mendelssohn's march into a brighter future.

Rule 4. Do not include “half”

As soon as you turn on your “other half”, who is bored, suffers and otherwise demonstrates their inferiority without him - well, it’s gone. Word forms that emphasize your inferiority against the background of its significance, forget like a bad dream (“I miss you,” “I miss you,” “You have become the meaning of my life”). And without esotericism (“Fate itself brought us together”).

How to continue communication?

When the foundation of communication has already been laid, it is necessary to ensure that the first dialogue does not become the last. To do this you need to follow these rules:

• First, maintain the conversation within the framework of the topic at hand, gradually expanding the range of interests;
• ask open-ended questions to which the guy will not give “yes” or “no” answers;
• after receiving a message from him, you don’t need to respond immediately, it’s better to wait a couple of minutes;
• a good psychological technique for approaching a real date is to write messages 2 times shorter than he sends;
• Don't overdo it with emoticons.

You shouldn't attack a guy with a lot of messages. He will consider the girl annoying, annoying, and will simply stop responding.