Why don't men like to talk about their feelings?

Individual restraint

There are naturally shy young men who do not know how to pronounce loud words. They cannot apply any eulogies to their personality. Somewhere deep down in their souls they consider themselves unworthy of the highest happiness. Restraint comes from the habit of acting in a certain way, it consists of character traits.

In most cases, the surrounding reality does not in any way contribute to the manifestation of personal activity. The conditions of modern reality often require a certain resourcefulness from a person, the ability to bring the work started to its logical conclusion. It is impossible to see any practical result in feelings, so they are often swept aside. Individual restraint is a good reason why a guy doesn’t say he loves you. He simply does not consider it necessary to utter these words. It must be good for him anyway.

How does a man show his feelings?

Do you like receiving gifts? After all, if your husband gives you something, and especially if something is important and necessary for you, then it’s doubly pleasant. For many men, a gift is a manifestation of his love for you. When presenting a gift, even a small trifle, he communicates between the lines that you are for him:

• important;
• darling;
• he remembers about you;
• he wants to please you;
• wants to see your joy;
• he loves you.

Yes, there are men who don’t give gifts; they think it’s not important, not obligatory. It is possible that they were raised this way, and in their parental family, little attention was paid to gifts, and they were not the main manifestation of love.

And I would like to add that for some men, gifts are the main language of love; in another way, they simply do not know how to show their love. And they feel love for themselves, also through gifts.

In family life, much is taken for granted, and it seems that some actions are not at all important and do not have any impact on the quality of the relationship. But that's not true...

If your husband, at your request, gives you his attention and time, then it is quite possible that this is how his love for you is manifested.

For example, you love the theater or like to go to concerts, and naturally you want your husband to be next to you.

Some men outright refuse to visit such places with their wives. But some, despite the fact that, of their own free will, they hardly went to the theater or the opera themselves, through “I don’t want and don’t like,” they go with their other half and pretend that they are even delighted with the visit.

He gives you subtle compliments

When someone openly compliments you, they are being open and honest and are probably not trying to hide anything. But when a man gives you careful, subtle compliments, this is a sign of uncertainty in reciprocity.

He's afraid to tell you that he likes you, so he gives you "safe" compliments that won't lead to awkwardness or embarrassment if you refuse them. Examples include:

• you look good;
• you are a really good listener;
• beautiful shirt/skirt/dress;
• you did a cool project;
• It's fun with you!
• You are really cool.
• I like your hairstyle.

Why does a man so rarely say he loves him?

• Inappropriate stage of relationship . This is not always the initial stage of a relationship when there is awkwardness and uncertainty. This could be 20 years of marriage and something that does not require daily proof.
• Principles of education in the family. Many parents instill in a boy coldness and callousness; such upbringing is considered masculine. It will be difficult to hear declarations of eternal and pure love from this person. Feelings are hidden under iron armor.
• Fear. Men are very afraid of being rejected or funny. This forces them not to admit their feelings for as long as possible. Perhaps when the relationship reaches a level of trust, you will receive verbal recognition.
• Embarrassment. Reluctance to talk about love may be part of temperament. A timid and shy person will not dare to open his heart right away; this will take time.
• Doubt about the feelings of the chosen one. Some guys take a wait-and-see attitude. They are never the first to admit their feelings. It may be necessary to go through difficult life situations in which the girl’s real intentions will appear. The chosen one will receive the coveted recognition.

You have to be prepared for rejection

A declaration of love does not guarantee a reciprocal declaration, so you need to be prepared for refusal. The chances of a person who decides to open up to the object of his passion are 50 to 50, so it is better to agree with yourself in advance that you will declare your love “just in case” and assume in advance a not very favorable scenario for the development of events. Then if they don’t reciprocate your feelings, there will be less disappointment: “No, no, I’ll find another one.” If you suddenly don’t like a person as much as you like him, this is not a universal catastrophe, this is normal. We are all very different, and everyone is looking for exactly “their soul mate.” There is a good aphorism on this topic: “If a man passes by me, I rejoice: it means that this is not my man!”

What did you miss: giving and receiving

A girl who is preoccupied with the question of why a guy doesn’t say that he loves me forgets about the main thing - all manifestations of love. If you focus on continuous confession of feelings, then your relationship will get worse.

Look at what your beloved does for you, treat any of his actions with gratitude. If you appreciate his expressions of feelings, he will want to please you more and more.

Don’t hold your lover under a tight rein; appreciate his free will. If you give him the opportunity to feel his own independence, he will understand that you are special.

An insistent desire to hear these words means that you are not confident enough in yourself. This means it's time to change something! Start taking care of your body, devoting time to your favorite things and making your dreams come true. Every man wants to love a happy woman.

Take your chosen one for who he is. When you truly love a guy, don't try to change him. If he can feel comfortable with you, this will speed up the expected “I love you”.

Nonverbal signs of falling in love

In addition to clearly expressed concern, a man can be betrayed by unconscious signs. He can deceive you and hide his sincere feelings, but he certainly won’t be able to deceive you with body language. Remember, he may not admit anything to you at all; his postures, facial expressions and gestures will tell him everything he thinks about you.

Psychological fact! A person in love has unstable behavior. The mood constantly changes - from sadness and thoughtfulness to joy and fun.

Sign language of a man in love

1. The body of a man in love always looks a little tense and constrained.
2. He is often shy and worried, and a sign of this will be shaking hands and sweaty palms.
3. A man involuntarily tries to demonstrate his body - he straightens his shoulders, showing off and thereby attracting the woman’s attention.
4. If a woman attracts him sexually, then during the period of communication with her he will begin to touch his thighs every now and then and put his hands on the belt.
5. When talking to the woman he loves, a man almost always tries to reduce the distance on a subconscious level. With or without reason, he tries to get closer, penetrating personal space.

Why does a woman wait so long for words of love?

It is very important for girls to hear the cherished words; they always strive to receive evidence of their partner’s strongest feelings. A woman is a flower; if there is no declaration of love, then she withers, that is, goes into depression, invents stories for herself, for example, that he has another, but he no longer needs her. These emotional feelings are caused by gender, upbringing and environment:

1. Since childhood, girls have been reading fairy tales about princesses with the same ending: the main character hears the long-awaited confession and finds a loved one for life. This stereotype is firmly ingrained in the head, and when a girl grows up, she begins to wait for a fairy-tale prince and cherished words about love.
2. There are women who dynamite men. For them, the words “I love you” mean achieving their goal. Thanks to this, they feel much more confident and rise in their own eyes.
3. For a woman, words of love are special; they indicate her attractiveness and increase self-esteem. Such girls need to be constantly reminded of their uniqueness.
4. Young ladies who hear confessions of love increase the level of endorphins in their bodies. Thanks to this, they feel happy and flutter like butterflies.
5. When a woman hears about love, she too can open her feelings. If the guy is silent, then she is afraid of being rejected.

Reasons for separation

Every couple has their own reasons for breaking up. Some rushed into relationships, others lost their feelings, and others were stupid. Often people fall in love and think that it will last a lifetime. They are in a hurry to live together, but in everyday life it turns out that they are completely different. On this basis, conflicts occur and, as a result, separation.

In a long-term relationship, a man and a woman get used to each other and feel their partner at the level of intuition. And if a breakup occurs, the pain in the heart torments for a long time. Not everyone succeeds in completely erasing a person from life right away, because anger, resentment, anger persists for some time.

Despite the fact that now people choose their own mates, some families still maintain ancient foundations. Parents look for a suitable match for their children, match them at a young age, and arrange a wedding when they reach adulthood. If the newlyweds are lucky and manage to fall in love with each other, they live happily. But it also happens that you fail to understand your partner even in simple things. After living together for some time, the couple separates.

In some cases, after a breakup, people still have to communicate: at work, in the hallway, in the company of mutual friends. When talking, it is important not to sort things out and not bring up the past, because this leads to unnecessary quarrels.

If a couple breaks up calmly, without violent emotions, they often remain friends. In this case, the relationship cannot be built again, and there is nothing to restore. After all, if the relationship ended on a positive note, it means there was no love, and without this feeling it is impossible to force yourself to live with the person again. People can continue to meet for intimate pleasures, but they don’t fundamentally change anything.

How to understand a guy's true feelings

And yet, if a man does not confess his love to a woman, how can we understand what he really feels? Psychologists say that there is nothing better than observation. We observe, analyze, draw conclusions.

A loving guy spends as much time together as possible with his beloved. The exception is business, but even then a man will always find time to write, call, or stop by in the evening for at least half an hour to see the lady of his heart. If they prefer you to friends, entertainment, alcohol, and don’t call/write/pick up the phone, there can be no talk of seriousness and love. It's the same with being interested in your life. If a man asks you about your day, knows your taste preferences, the name of the institute, faculty and specialty, your favorite genre of films - this is value. Otherwise, it's a waste of time.

A guy who is serious always solves the problems of his girlfriend. This is his meaning, credo, sincere desire, this is love. Your phone is broken, your salary is delayed, you get sick, you sprain your leg, your key is stuck in the lock, your suitcase is lost? A reliable partner will always make sure that you get through this as calmly, quickly and painlessly as possible. Caring in a relationship is one of the brightest forms of manifestation of love. A loving person will always listen, choose the right words, and provide moral, financial, and physical support. Everything else is empty promises.

Another clear proof of love: courtship, gifts, signs of attention. To do this, you don’t have to be rich, the main thing is the desire to make your loved one feel good. It could be a kind SMS in the morning, tea in bed, a new umbrella, an inscription on the asphalt, a massage after a working day, a favorite candy thrown into your purse, a chamomile in a glass, etc.

Respect and acceptance of the environment, maintaining contact with relatives is considered another sign that a guy loves his companion. Even if the relationship with your family or close people is strained, the guy will not offend you or say nasty things about them, be rude to them, or avoid meeting with them. No, if you are a significant part of his life, he will try to establish communication with them, restrain himself in critical moments, and reduce everything to neutrality.

Besides this, how else can you tell if a guy loves his girlfriend or is just having fun with her:

• he is concerned about your pain, tears, fears (indifferent individuals do not show sympathy or interest, the most you will get is a dismissive “calm down”);
• sacrifices his beliefs, rules, principles for the sake of the object of love (this is normal for loving people, because deep relationships are built on cooperation);
• accepts you as absolute, with all your advantages and disadvantages (only consumers mold an ideal person for themselves);
• jealous (and it’s not a matter of trust, it’s just that men who love have this feeling heightened);
• can always protect you both morally and physically (love has no cowardice, but a person who lacks warm feelings does not feel the desire to stand up for you, to stand up “mountain”);
• a loving guy always tries to anticipate your steps in advance: whether you are in danger, whether you will have problems, whether you will break your arm while jumping with a parachute, whether you will remain hungry, having spent your entire bonus on shopping, etc.

A lot of such arguments can be given. So if your boyfriend does not talk about love, but demonstrates his warm attitude with all his heart, calm down and enjoy what is happening. Believe me, you are very lucky.

In fact, everything is simple: a loving man, even if he does not talk about his feelings, values ​​his woman; a man who does not love does not. Open your eyes, break empty illusions.

What to do if he doesn't confess his love

We have already agreed that the option of “confessing first” is cut off. Of course, this would simplify a lot. But no means no. Then what methods and manipulations remain? Depending on the reason why a man does not take the initiative, there are different ways to solve the problem. Let's imagine at least universal ones.

1. Positive attitude. If a man is not sure, if he has already had a negative experience, if he is looking for unrealistic “suitable conditions,” he simply needs to know that you are interested in him. And this will have to be emphasized in every possible way. Be happy with him, smile more when you are with him, stay in a good mood. Don't miss the chance to help the guy and provide moral support. All this is called a positive attitude or positive communication. Feeling that you are interested in him, the man may make up his mind.
2. Interest in his opinion. More often you are interested in what kind of women he likes best, what style of communication he prefers, where he likes to go, and so on. Don't think that men are stupid and don't take hints. A normal guy will understand that you are interested for a reason. This information will help you look better in his eyes. It will also come in handy in the future, when you start a serious relationship.
3. Candid hints. Yes, I’m almost the first to admit this. But still, making a hint is much easier than the first step. There are many options for hints. For example, you can say that the guy is important to you, that you are ready to change your plans for him, refuse other offers. Emphasize that this person occupies a special place in your life. Perhaps the most thick-skinned and slow-witted man should understand that it’s time to develop relationships.

Sometimes you can come across recommendations that you can provoke a man to take the first step by causing jealousy. Questionable statement: If a man is not confident in himself or is not confident in you, that you are his future, jealousy will not provoke a declaration of love. Quite the opposite: he will decide that you are one of thousands of superficial, unreliable, frivolous ladies. If you use jealousy as a means of manipulation, then only with a self-confident and determined man.

How to tell if your husband loves you

Very often, women, without hearing words of love from their husband, begin to doubt his feelings. To avoid conflict, try to understand the situation yourself. The most important question you should ask yourself is: how much time do you take up in your husband’s life? The answer to this question will completely clarify the situation, and you will understand how your husband treats you. A loving man will always put his wife, her interests, and feelings first.

So many acts and expressions of love go unnoticed because a person simply gets used to them or is too busy to stop and thank their partner.

Spend each evening doing the following:

Celebrate the good things you and your husband have done for each other. Write down, to be specific, make a list. List everything: a phone call, a kiss, a kind word, a car door open for you.

You will be amazed when you look back and realize how much your husband does for you.

Summing up, I would like to recall the popular saying that the husband is the head, and the wife is the neck. It depends only on you where your husband will turn and how he will treat you.

He looks jealous but hides it

When you like someone and they don't know it, you jealously watch how other people interact with them. The same is true for most men. So, if you are talking or flirting with others, you may notice that the person who likes you is agitated or angry.

Of course, he may not admit his jealousy and will not allow it to get out of control. Jealousy, after all, is not a very positive emotion and can be toxic. But you will still be able to notice his clenched teeth and changes in behavior when he sees you with someone else.